Ballerina

We got new movie sign!

Been a friggin' minute, and I have to admit I was very much looking forward to this movie since hearing about it. So how was it? I will fully say it's pretty good but whether or not you hold it as highly as the John Wick quadrilogy is up to the person, and frankly I am in dire need of a rewatch to make that decision myself. But it simultaneously follows suite and yet plays around with the formula a bit that's been established, with a relatively new agent who takes on the mantle more of a guardian than assassin who is on the hunt for what is deemed a cult of assassins who killed her father when she was young, simple story but the devil is in the details. Obviously Ana has been more of a grower on me, and I may or may not have my own headcanon this is Paloma from No Time To Die before she was in Cuba, but man does she firmly plant her action hero flag in this movie. I mean she gets her ass beat six ways to Sunday but in the few instances of Jedi wisdom I agree with, perseverance reveals the path and she keeps getting up to pretty brutally dispatch opponents. Whether or not this continues with a sequel, I like the story they told here even if it is common as dirt. Of course we got Keanu in it and I'm happy they do much much more with him than just a glorified cameo and he comes in clutch like always. Gabriel Byrne is our villain and the performance itself was good but the material is pretty weak, no fault of course on the actor but it is your typical John Wick villain. There's probably a reason Norman Reedus wasn't brought up a lot in the marketing and considering I've seen next door to zero of his work, for the brief screentime he has I had enough interest and actually wanted to see him throw down more! Of course we also got Ian McShane but who I wasn't expecting was our man Lance back, in his final role no less and while they're very much ancillary characters I'm never going to turn away the chance to see them. The action fare has that gold stamp of approval from previous entries, with a fair bit of innovative fighting including a pair of ice skates, hammers, and a flamethrower, so it got faaaaar from predictable or boring, with ample love going to the stunt crew and the choreographers. Visually it's a striking film, with unabashed favorites including a rocking club and the snow filled night that gives it so much substance on screen, but even in environments like a log cabin or some construction site on Continental grounds still has elements that play into the action where every fight has one memorable moment minimum. I would be remiss to not briefly touch on the score, while far from explosive still sets mood and tension well and frankly any movie with Swan Lake gets at least half a point! So all in all I'm happy to have seen it, it's worth supporting your local theater to watch it, and I can see die hard fans of this series eagerly pick it up on video in the future. So 3.5 stars, 8/10, and I'll be back with a foray through time and space once more!

Sonic The Hedgehog 3

Best of the series?

I do genuinely think it is the most fun and entertainment I've personally had at one of these movies. They did have me sold full truth here since the end of the last movie on Shadow alone, so I was very much looking forward to this. And if you've seen the trailer you know the gist, Shadow has escaped containment and is battling team Sonic (cute reference) while Robotnik meets his long lost grandpappy as they command a doomsday weapon. Solid plot for a video game movie, and speaking as an individual who has really only played five Sonic games, Sonic 1 & 2, Sonic Adventure 1 & 2, and Sonic Heroes but has beat precisely zero of them I loved seeing all the easter eggs and especially Shadow's backstory seen on the big screen. Since we already know most of the players let's talk about our new arrivals. Keanu Reeves though not my immediate first choice for Shadow conveys everything you need to know and does do a damn fine job juggling the heartbreak, rage, and initial confusion to his origins in the flashback scenes and it was absolutely awesome to see so many nods to his character from the games, motorcycle and guns included! As for Robotnik Sr. I was very surprised to see him as the true threatning villain, sure he has his moments of humor but at the end of the day he is a serious villain and I applaud Jim for being able to bring both sides to the table, plus the guy is a manipulative bastard and it like works too and doesn't feel slapdash in the writing. Commendable! I'll add on a brief opinion of seeing Sonic actually buckle the hell down and get serious even vengeful was a good move and added more to his character. I was hoping and praying they wouldn't do the thing, I didn't say anything cause I didn't want to jinx it, but they can't let a trilogy be a trilogy. Granted it was even I'll admit a great mid credits scene but come on! We went out on a relatively high note, with multiple instances of goosebumps at the climax, it's a solid made film with very good production values, the writing and humor still worked for me, it did what every sequel should do, and I was very happy to see it! We had a pretty healthy attendance at the screening and hearing the kids get so excited seeing stuff like Shadow and the Chao's while also laughing at Jim Carrey put me in a good mood. Thumbs up from me, 3 stars, 7.5/10! And next week is the end and what more of a perfect day to end it on than Christmas, at least it'll be a spooky Christmas...

Dracula (1992)

Yeah I'm pretty happy with this one.

I don't know whether or not the reception of this film has went up or down over the three decades since it's release, but I'm in the camp of liking it a good deal. Easily the most lavishly produced, faithful, and striking adaptation of the story in film, Francis Ford Coppola bet it all on this movie to save his sinking film company with a solid budget of 40 million and pulled in over 200 million when all was said and done, and I can understand why. True the movie leans a bit more into romance than abject horror, but it didn't bother me all that much. The stuff that is creepy, freaky, and just plain horrific had a strong effect on me. Never once in all vampire media have I ever cringed and shirked away from seeing a vampire consume blood, but the razor scene in this movie mm-mmm. No way, that creeped me right the fuck out man, gave me the heebie-jeebies! And the romance while assuredly dramatic I bought into, it strangely worked for me. Only a handful of details I noticed didn't make the jump from page to screen, but all the things that did make it give a lotta brownie points to this film! The production is batshit insane, I cannot believe the visuals in this movie, and to think everything was done in camera with next to zero post production or computer graphics work kinda blows my socks off. The sets, the costumes, the scope of it all, it's almost illegal how grand this movie looks. Star studded cast and I gotta just say real quick oh ho boy this is gonna be sacreligious, Gary Oldman had such a perfect voice and presence for what was required in this role. I know, Bela Lugosi is THE voice, he is friggin' Dracula as long as the world keeps turning. However! Gary got me creeped out, entranced, and invested. The hair at the beginning though, absurd. But I can't change it so I gotta live with it, and everything else was great about him. Winona Ryder as Mina was very nice, and I'm actually happy she has more of a role to play cause in all seriousness Mina and Lucy are barely even there in any adaptation. Anthony Hopkins was riding a high and beautiful wave in the early 90s due to Silence Of The Lambs and I did like him a fair bit, I mean this is the most exotic and foreign Van Helsing I've seen since Edward Van Sloan. Keanu my son, I'm thrilled you have a shining career nowadays and I understand you were burnt the hell out making this, so I will not trash you here but I do feel a different actor would have worked more. I do however wish we got more Cary Elwes, Richard E. Grant, and Billy Campbell as Arthur, Seward, and Quincey respectively cause well I'm a sucker for Cary and Richard, and huzzah Quincey is proper texan and was kinda awesome! I do find it hilarious though they had to cut about 20 minutes of gore effects out though the film was in no danger of getting a higher rating than an R, but they absolutely kept every breastises and charged erotic moment in this movie no problem. I mean I think they were in a moooood making this movie, my God Hammer wasn't this gratuitous and revelling in the sexy aspects, but here? Make sure the kids are in bed or out of the house before flipping this on. Lawd have mercy! Moving swiftly on. I really digged this movie, I loved the lavish design and tone, I was most definitely entertained, I give it 3.5 stars and an 8/10! Next week, it is high past time we pay our respects to the king of low budget pictures with his acclaimed and memorable Poe series.

John Wick: Chapter 4

I really hate to say this but I don't feel this will be a competent review.

I was an absolute fool, and you can quote me on that, not taking the opportunity to do an In Retrospect of John Wick 3 because I am always on the level here and I speak plainly. I did not remember jack shit about the last 3 movies, I mean nothing. Nada. Zip. And...it's kinda friggin' pertinent information to have so it almost legitimately was like I walked into this movie without watching previous installments. Hell I re-read my old reviews to try to jog my memory and it didn't ring a bell, ding a bell, or ting a bell in my head. So I apologize profusely in advance, if I sound like I don't know what I'm talking about...yeah. So we pick up some time after Parabellum, John is still excommunicated, Winston and Charon are in hot water with the higher ups, and some bitch boy lieutenant apparently thinks he has John Wick's number. I don't remember if that guy was in the last movie, I think he was, but fuck that guy in this movie! He just irked me the right way that few villains can do, so props for that completely! Seeing Ian and Lance again in these roles was simultaneously joyous and bittersweet, I mean nobody could have foresaw Lance Reddick's unfortunate and very sudden passing and it just sucked man. Cause I greatly enjoyed his bits in these movies and now that's it. And of course Keanu back in the suit again (and I will talk about that suit I assure you), it's another fine outing for him and once more he relies on almost silent acting with few lines and lets his body language do the talking. And I gotta say, for an almost 3 hour film which didn't feel it's length, I greatly appreciate the not necessarily lack of action scenes but more the balance between action and quiet moments, I think I counted 5 action sequences total. Granted they are very lavishly choreographed, wonderfully even ingeniously shot at long stretches of time but never feeling dull. Yet the shining pieces of the movie are the beautiful, and I do truly mean beautiful, quiet, peaceful interludes that just worked wonders for me. Pay attention to that shit! But I also give my thanks for them just going all out and giving us an eastern sword duel with Donnie Yen and Hiroyuki Sanada and a western gun duel with Keanu, briefly settling into the rhythm and filmmaking of those genres as nothing but loving homage. However! Yell at me if you wish but was the bulletproof clothing in the last movie? I don't mean the fully decked out head to toe, nary an opening, straight up special forces armor. Oh no, I mean the fucking jump the shark, tailored, nice ass suits which are bulletproof. What. The fuck? I think I would recall something like that previously and shout bullshit! It makes zero goddamn sense both in universe and from a filmmaking perspective other than they needed an excuse to make the fight scenes longer. Well shit, how do we do that? What if we made our characters impervious like the last son of Krypton? My God, Johnson's done it again! And motherfuck, I said what I meant and I meant what I said, you do not fall 3 storeys onto a van and just walk that shit off. Bulletproof suit or not. It really kept taking me out of it. Now one scene that did not and if anything got my nerves skyrocketing is the staircase segment, where it's like the fucking Exorcist Steps × 100, just because of a ticking clock implemented. Well done on that! And even that ain't got shit on the Zelda shootout, you'll understand that reference when you see it classic gamers out there. I mean sweet Jesus that was a feat! I did actually expect the movie to end on an ambiguous note because I heard something about the director wanting to take a break before the next John Wick movie but it ends on a solid definitive note which thank you for that as well. So I don't know man, I'm stumped. Did I like it? A good deal yeah! But booooy howdy do I need to have me a little movie marathon once this hits video and re-evaluate my stance. But all in all I give it 3.5 stars, 8/10! And tomorrow is nothing but the beginning of the end or perhaps the end of the beginning.

Speed

Bit different from what I knew.

I'm not sure exactly how or why but Speed really got some cultural osmosis transference to me. I mean it is not a bad premise for a kind of thriller action summer movie, and yet there was a good deal I had no clue about. And I actually really really enjoy movies where you think you know the whole plot but then it surprises you! Gives you a bit more. So, set up. This is the city Los Angeles, California where we meet officers Jack and Harry who have to contend with a mad bomber on two seperate occasions, now I may be in a severe minority here but I greatly enjoyed the elevator setpiece more than the bus setpiece. Not only is it a really great way to start an action movie by basically giving you an action movie climax and resolution just as the beginning 25 minutes, but the way it was all put together with cinematography, dialogue, and the sequence of events worked for me tremendously. Is that to say the main plot of a bomb being placed on a bus rigged to blow if the speed limit drops below 50mph bad? Hell no! In fact it's truthfully been a long ass time since I have experienced flat out, no horseshit, on the edge of my seat tension and entertainment in my life. Yet I don't think I can explain why. It's almost stressful to watch when something awry happens, and that really goes to show what a good setpiece and production this was! And I got to applaud the living shit out of this production, cause if it's not 100% all real it's mighty damn close to it! I think I saw one model shot at the tail end, but all the crashes, maneuvers, and explosions are legit. The tone holds pretty solid realism for the most part and that adds to the excitement of the movie. Keanu does good here, he has enough to do and works as an officer so good on him. Dennis Hopper is your villain, I need not say more apart from the fact I would be scared shitless if I met that guy, and he is just that right flavor of fucking nuts in this movie. Sandra Bullock I'm a bit perplexed on how to word this but, I found her personality and acting endearing and kinda adorable. I don't know, just how she acted put a smile on my face, but that romance was bullllshit. Sorry, the movie would have worked better without it and it did not need it in the slightest. But that's a small gripe in a good movie. And yes I fully believe Jeff Daniels plays the same Harry in this as he does in Dumb & Dumber. Good times! All in all a pretty good movie, it has enough for me to call it great even, solid premise, very good execution, and has a lot of love for it even today. I give it 3.5 stars, 8/10! Will the 4th be the last for Mr. Wick? We'll find out next time.

Johnny Mnemonic

Probably one of Keanu's least recognized films but may have played some part in him getting The Matrix role.

Set in the far distant future of 2021 the world has kinda gone to shit, with the advancements of technology and augmentation a virus has spread across the world to an epidemic state with no cure or real discernable origin, as we meet Johnny a courier of data and information for hire using his brain as a hard drive when he gets a data package a bit too much for him in more ways than one, leading to it being a race to extract the data before his head completely blows a fuse. For a movie made in 1995 it called a few things right and crafts an interesting world that arguably could be said has further stories set in it, cause it's not too futuristic and cyberpunk. The cityscape is normal, nothing is presented as far out and highly futuristic, people just so happen to have cybernetic body parts. It truthfully really reminded me of Ghost In The Shell in terms of setting and tech, they even flat out have a line about the ghost in the machine, so the movie wears it's influence on it's sleeve and tells a competent story. Clocking in just over 90 minutes, it moves at a very good pace and doesn't overstimulate you with technobabble and a complex story but neither does it hold your hand throughout, sure some aspects of the plot are forced if not at warp factor 1 like the romance but it's a decent flick. Keanu is okay, I think this was still him trying to find his groove and honestly the best part is when he goes on this completely uncalled for and hilarious tirade near the end, but hey I'm not expecting groundbreaking acting in a 90s sci-fi film. Dina Meyer plays Jane, a lady who takes on the position of bodyguard for Johnny for a hefty sum, and I will say she is the better of our two leads but some deliveries are kinda off. I attribute that partly due to script, tone, and direction in equal parts. Dolph Lundgren looks like he's having some fun as this religious nutcase hitman, so that was fun! Ice-T I'm kinda wondering why he's in this but he ain't terrible, just oddly casted. The only thing the director had under his belt beforehand was one episode of Tales Of The Crypt, but in terms of cinematography, editing, and effects (though the effects are gloriously 90s when it comes to cyberspace) it looks pretty good. There's some atmosphere, dingy lived in sets, neat props, gnarly practical gore effects, and a few explosions. It's not bad! To be completely on the level though the only reason I knew of this movie to begin with was Spoony's review of the PC game, the premise sounded interesting so I figured why not spotlight a lesser known film of Keanu's career. It's not a great film but far from terrible, I think I could only solely recommend it for people who just want to see the futuristic tech bits, seeing Keanu in a movie before The Matrix but after Bill & Ted, and wonder why in the hell aren't we surfing the world wide web in the most overcomplicated yet bitchin' way possible? 2.5 stars, 6/10, and we're hitting the mainstream next time.

The League Of Super Pets

Oh thank God. Not as bad as I thought it was going to be.




Yeah, after a re-evaluation of The Batman and the very very good Snyder cut I needed this to be decent. Thankfully I can report it was okay, in terms of overall quality. It has a really neat art design, taking a lot of art deco/50s futurisic influence to the backgrounds and environments, with some pretty cool character designs for the human superheroes. The fact alone I get to see a Superman suit a la' Kingdom Come is pretty sick, Diana is somehow even more awesome looking than normal I mean woof (ha ha ha....), Aquaman is a neat mix of classic comics and Justice League Unlimited, we got a new Green Lantern I was not aware of and hello there madame I will research you immediately, poor Flash and Bats could have had more interesting designs to be honest, we even get a frickin' rad Mercy Graves so I'm pretty happy on that front. But the focus is of course on the pets and they are mostly miss for me, not much love for Krypto or Ace (and that is the only time I will speak blasphemy on the name of Ace), the pig PB was cute, the squirrel...eh, but my favorites were the geriatric turtle and not just cause she cusses and it made me lose my shit in the theater, and of course the villains. Kate McKinnon my babe, you once again are my shining star and play one of the unironically best villains I've seen in an animated film in some time and she has a pretty kitty henchman who is cute as heck and will annihilate your enemies with extreme prejudice. I want him. That's the thing with this movie for me, I don't particularly care about Krypto or his story, more the funny odd stuff that happens along the way. It's an average basic premise and plot but it is serviceable. The comedy actually got me more than I could have fathomed, the villain is brilliant but even then has some groaner jokes, the turtle was amazing but any kids movie that drops an F bomb whether censored or not has some respect from me, and the semi-Looney Tunes physical humor worked in places. I am taking this as a small victory, it wasn't bullshit from cover to cover it was just painfully adequate with some bright spots. I can live with that. 2.5 stars, 6/10, and we got only one more week before I take a summer break so we will go out with a bang.

John Wick: Chapter 3

Well so much for a trilogy.

I have a theory, trilogies are dead. Movie series nowadays are either a one and done, or have contracted severe sequelitis. I read how the director and Keanu Reeves wanted a straight up trilogy so the series wouldn't be bogged down by sequels, and I'm on board for that! When I thought we still had 30 to 40 minutes left of film, the credits started to roll and that really pissed me off man! Do not get me wrong, after a very busy day this was the perfect movie to cap off the day and blow off some steam. The audience reactions and energy levels were part of the fun of the movie, I will also say stuff goes down in this movie here and there but it's just much of the same. I equate the John Wick series with music, music is built around repetition, that steady beat that keeps going from start to finish while being interwoven with melodies and so forth. The action is the beat, the repetition, it has it's own style and formula and while it is great and visually interesting it is still the same thing over and over. The dialogue scenes which again I must give credit to that they actually know when to break off the action and give you time to breathe and relax, are the melody interjected between the ongoing beat. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with formulaic storytelling if it's done right, and it is here, the movie never failed to hold my attention or to have me engaged in the fights. They are expertly crafted fights with real talent and skill at play along with excellent camera work, lighting, and editing! It's great fun to watch! But it's starting to wear down on me, with the first film I loved how the action was done in every aspect, second film gave me even more and I still enjoyed it, here it gets tiring just a bit. So all I have to say is, end it at four movies, have your really cool badass tetralogy, to not only keep your unique style and story interesting and complete without ruining it but to also avoid degrading in quality sequels. If you liked the first movie and the second, go see the movie. If you are a fan of action, go see the movie. If you're in it purely for Keanu Reeves, go see the movie. It's a very good movie that I have no doubts will be enjoyed across the world by many, many people. Have fun with it, and I will see you next time.

John Wick: Chapter 2

Now I'm very very interested to see where this goes.

Does the sequel surpass the first? Well it's much of the same but with a lot of new stuff in it as well. I feel the driving force of the movie was stronger in the first, you were with John every step of the way, sons of bitches stole his car and killed his dog. You wanted them dead, you wanted their families dead, you wanted their house burned to the ground! But in this one after a bit of time has passed since the first movie, John is contacted by an old peer who has come to collect on a debt, but doing so would flip the criminal organization of the world upside down and John is trying to put his past behind him. But old debts get settled, and our Mr. Wick finds himself on the run. What I enjoyed more in this one than the first, is how much time is given to John trying to just put everything behind him, he's squared away after the last movie and is trying to bury his blood stained past and move on to a better life, but as soon as he's out they pull him back in, and it sucks because you really want him to have a good life. Beyond that though it was nice seeing Ian McShane and Lance Reddick back, I always enjoy seeing them and I really do love their characters, the action is still kept up at a very good pace I mean you're flying through this movie without even realizing it, the story is still simple though I will admit not as good as the first. Don't get me wrong, I still like the movie, it's a solid good movie! But it isn't better than the first, and yet the new additions are nice. More worldbuilding is always a plus, we travel to new locations, some great visuals are sprinkled throughout particularly the final shootout. And for some reason the henchwoman of the villain in this movie, played by Ruby Rose, is infinitely more interesting and cool than our main antagonist, I can't explain it she's just cool, she's like the female Oddjob minus the steel rimmed hat, I like the fact she speaks through sign language and is always on the heels of John, I just greatly enjoyed her in this movie! And there's one scene, I can't really spoil it but it kinda hit me man, it was quiet, slightly sad, and even a bit powerful. It just really grabbed me and reminded me of another instance in the James Bond series, but I'll leave that for you to decipher which. Good movie, I more enjoyed it for what it's setting up in the third movie than the plot of this one, but everything is done just as well and I really did like it and enjoy it. So will the 3rd movie be the best and cap off this well made trilogy? Guess we'll find out soon.

John Wick

I can see why people liked it.

John Wick is good ol' 70s revenge flick done with the modern cinematography of any finely made film. Our man John is a retired hitman and living his life, he sadly loses his wife to an illness and soon owns a little pup. But some jackass russians done f***ed up, trash his place, steal his car, and kill his puppy! That's like rule #4, you can butcher people wholesale and we don't give a shit but you can never kill a pet, because humans suck and pets are awesome. But aside from that, I really liked it but honestly you think people would have you believe this film is the second coming of Christ. I heard not one even slightly average word about this movie, it is a glowingly reviewed movie from audiences and probably even critics and I don't get it. It's a finely made film, it looks excellent, it's got a good budget, good actors, a simple but still effective story, and some pretty great action. I don't deny that I enjoyed it and think it's a good movie but what did other people see to make them go full out, "OH MY GOD THIS IS THE GREATEST MOVIE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!"? The story in all it's aspects, plot, dialogue, character, and the world they built is really damn good. I think Keanu Reeves did a fine job and acts well, I can tell what he feels from facial expressions and believe every bit of the movie building him up as this absurdly good hitman. I love the world they build, anyone can watch the movie and follow it great, you fully understand who everyone is and where they fit into this story, and with little dialogue there's no need for exposition, they can tell you everything visually and that's just good directing. And yeah the dialogue is small, but it's used effectively and doesn't waste time, you can immediately recognize and understand the relationships between these various characters with no backstory ever required. How many times can you say that about a movie? There's no newbie who's new to this game and has to have everything explained, you roll with it quickly and easily. That's something very strongly appreciated and admired in my book. I'm curious to see what happens next in the sequel before the possibly final chapter hits this Friday so until next time be good people.