Mortal Kombat II

Oh thank God, it's better!

Actually a vast improvement on every front in my estimation, I actually had a pretty good time with this movie! Damn near everyone is back but what kinda took me by surprise is how much time we spend with newcomers Kitana played by Adeline Rudolph and Johnny fucking Cage played by Karl fucking Urban which isn't necessarily a bad thing, Kitana has major ties to our new big bad on the scene Shao Khan and I really loved what they did with Johnny making him a washed up martial arts film star thrown into the deep end of the pool. Of course it's great to see Jessica, Ludi, and Tadanobu again and they still do very fine work, hell I'll even give a bit of credit and say they juggled the roster list pretty solidly! Everyone gets their own fights and moments to shine equally which has always kinda been the cardinal sin with the fighting games turned into movies. This really does seem like a movie for the fans, so much was thrown in from characters, to arenas, to moves, to little easter eggs here and there. Now can I freely admit to you all the last Mortal Kombat game I played was coincidentally 2 on the Super Nintendo and technically 3 on the arcade cabinet? Just did. So there's probably a good bit that I missed but the fact alone we got my favorite character Baraka in this, and he was great, and they didn't throw his ass out like they did in Annihilation gets you at least a solid 1.5 points added to your score movie! The only thing I could kinda bitch about and this is the most pathetic thing to bitch about so tune me out creators of this film who read the reviews, but the selection of arenas for the fights left just a bit to be desired. We have one courtyard for I swear 3 or 4 fights, we have the spike room (not the pit sadly), the acid room which was beautifully accurate, and the portal sans the creepy floating monks. God awful? Of course not. But even my novice ass knows you have a practical buffet of arenas to throw a fucking dart at, but other than that terribly nitpicky ass aside, pretty good movie! Fights are varied, they got no problem bodying people which could piss some people off admittedly, the kills make the first movie look pathetic in comparison in terms of gore and inventive gore at that. It moves at a good pace, the characters aren't super deep but have good motivation, the effects are really nice, they even got some neat-o cinematography in there at times which I very much appreciated, and it was actually pretty damn funny! I was surprised how many laughs I got, so well done on that front writers! It appears my hope and faith was not mislaid, and while it does kinda sequel bait the shit out of the end which I have several questions about because heeeey Mortal Kombat noob over here, I'm happy with it. So I guess I have my best of both worlds with the 1995 first movie and the 2026 second movie, and I am rather curious what the die hard fans think about it. All in all I give it 3 stars, 7.5/10, and I will see y'all next week for another new release.

In Retrospect: Mortal Kombat (2021)

I guess there's a reason this spawns from a company called MIDway.

I think my estimation has actually fallen since I saw this opening day. Like dude, I would gladly take the 90s film over this. And it took me a second to kinda articulate as to why, but the quality of this film overall is like if a Sci-Fi Channel original movie had an actual budget. This halfassed script, decent actors but not great characters, blank slate of a protagonist which makes me wonder why the fuck we even have him, the slightly off beat references that should be awesome but kinda make you roll your eyes when they happen, the effects which are passable, just everything about this leans so much into that direct to cable movie element which I have to say I've not seen in a considerably long time. Now I know, I know...it was a rough goddamn patch of time when this movie went into production and when it got released, I'm taking that into consideration and not trying to bash it too hard. Cause it's not a bad movie, this is nowhere near Annihilation but it ain't that goddamn good either folks. Best damn scene in the movie is the opening, it was investing, a notch emotional, had really good fight choreography, I loved it! I think the true nail in the coffin for this is our main character, may I ask why we just decided to add some guy who isn't a character in the games to be our focus and might I go one step further and ask why did you make him the most uninteresting nothing character? Poor Lewis Tan had exactly two things to work with, jack and shit. And jack left town. He's trying but there is nothing to this to the point where I almost feel offended for the guy, imagine you got cast in a Mortal fucking Kombat movie and you're just some...guy. Not Liu Kang, not Johnny Cage, not even Stryker! It's almost stunning how bland Cole is. Like...I gotta move on, I'm gonna be hear all fucking day. I will however say I do indeed have higher hopes for the second film, I truly do. It does look better. As long as they don't do stupid shit like in this where you drop Kung Lao in that undignified fashion, kill Goro in THE FIRST FRAKKING MOVIE HELLLLOOOOOO, and not even give us the shit sucking tournament on which this entire franchise is built upon, we'll be fine! Those are choices man, but they are not good ones! Holy fuckaroli it's like the longer I think about it the more the score dwindles. But hey, they at least didn't rush a sequel. It took them 5 years to get around to Mortal Kombat II and I will commend the filmmakers on that alone, all the time in the world to iron this script out, make the right calls, and craft a good movie. I'm not saying I'm walking in with the highest of expectation but I'm certainly walking in with hope. I however am leaving this film never to return. 1.5 stars, 4.5/10, I'll catch you tomorrow!

Maul Shadow Lord

My chains are broken, the Force has freed me.

I'll level with you, I kinda forgot this show was a thing until we got a trailer for it about 2 or 3 months ago. Now of course me being the dark sider that I am and somehow as each year passes more and more a formerly Darth now just Maul fan, I knew my ass was gonna sit down week after week for this show. I was justly rewarded, taking on more of a noir style lens before shifting into the action style animation we have been watching for almost two decades we pick up kind of in a grey area with Maul's timelime sometime after Son Of Dathomir but years before Rebels as he is slowly but surely reinstating himself in the criminal underwolrd and is seeking a pupil, an acolyte if you will, where we meet a tight knit of supporting characters including two jedi knights and a police captain who gets swept up in the mix. The first thing I gotta get out of the way is the animation, holy bawls this animation! Combining classic Clone Wars style with an added dimension of brushstroke visuals straight out of Visions, I'm not only proud of the animators for doing something this different but am here to say this is a resounding superior style to an already excellent basis we've seen in recent years of Star Wars animation. It's no secret the voice cast top to bottom is great, I'd be here all goddamn day talking about how, I still don't know how, Sam has just kept climbing the Everest of voice acting for Maul with quite possibly the most flowery dare I even say Shakespearian dialogue yet in this universe. It's unreal. Gideon Adlon as our prized apprentice Devon is great, we've seen fugitive Jedi before but she brings a new element and stance that is highly welcome and the fact we're getting season 2 of this has me glued for upcoming news regarding her character. Dennis Haysbert as her master Daki gets to ride that line between sagely Jedi Master and something unknown not only conflicting with his student but also working side by side with Maul for their survival which is shall we say unique. Further compounding that we are introduced to Lawson played to silky smooth effect by Wagner Moura, a lawman firmly planting his pole on the wrong damn hill not only contending with Maul and his mandalorians but also trying to stave off the Empire which he has no love for, we spend a good amount of time with him seeing his home life, character, and resilience even in the most dire straits which makes him a fine addition to our Star Wars family. For a 10 episode season (bit by bit we'll get back to 20 episode seasons one way or another) it's paced damn near perfect, hooks you in almost immediately, builds more and more with stakes and developments with each episode, and caps off simultaneously in a mental finale and yet a more subdued conclusion. Or at least a season conclusion not a series conclusion obviously. I will admit I think episode 5 was a lull but I will never say it was bad, it just seemed like they pumped the brakes when everything before and after keeps revving up to more awesome moments. I need not tell you any and I do mean ANY duel with Maul is glorious, it really puts it all into perspective how much progress we have made since season 1 of The Clone Wars back in frick-frakking 2008. I just loved it to bits, I think this really was the Lucasfilm project I was anticipating most since The Acolyte, and if Shadow Lord can get another season why not The Acolyte? I require more dark side media in my life gawd dyammit! But oh how the party is not over yet in a galaxy far far away, but until that special moment I give this 4 stars, 9/10, and I got a new release for you coming up this Friday.

Batman Beyond: Season 3

Sort of an innocuous ending for the series but overall quite good.

For a final batch of 13 episodes that more or less capped off this series I have to say I was in a better mood and far less nitpicky this time around. We get some standout episodes this time around including a loooong awaited return for Inque, a slight throwback to The Animated Series with Talia al Ghul, a two parter involving the future Justice League which has some important behind the scenes ties I'll share momentarily, and of course the season and series finale which showcases Terry unmasked but not quite for the reasons you think. I feel the quality of the storytelling is on par if not slightly above the second season, in retrospect that first season was easily the best but let that not dissuade you from enjoying the rest of the show. It's a damn fine piece of television that has garnered a cult following for almost the entirety of my life, and the simple fact that there has been so much spinoff material with Terry in decades past proves it deserves the love. The animation is still rock solid and has some neat visual moments, and while the actual character development is slim to nothing the acting is still gold standard from everyone. It was undoubtedly a treat to finally talk Batman Beyond and though I've really only been a fan for just a notch over a decade I'm glad to say I own it all on video. But all things must come to an end and in a bizarre twist of fate Warner Bros. Animation shelved and ended Batman Beyond in favor of pursuing a Justice League series which is a fantastic show in my estimation and hopefully the day will not be far where I can review that in it's entirety, so the story of future Batman was rather unceremoniously ended and given a tiny bit of an epilogue which...I don't entirely hate but I certainly have questions. I was rather debating on if I should include that cause it really is the sendoff for the series (kinda) but it involves megaton spoilers so it's not really like I could divulge it anyway. Do I wish we got more overarching character progression and development just overall for the show? Of course, even though it really wasn't the style yet in animated shows until a good while later. It's simultaneously an immense blessing and an unfortunate curse for older cartoons, cause on one hand you get your episode of the week, you can just watch it, enjoy it, and move on to the next. Yet on the other hand you kinda want a more expansive involved story especially cause it's original characters, it's a new setting, we don't have, well at that point anyway, 60 years of backstory to know about Batman and his villains. But you know what? It's okay, we've had other stuff come after this that embellishes the world of 2039 Batman and anybody who is curious can dig into that. I still love the show, I love the animated universe it inhabits, and this is just the beginning actually of my own personal dive back into the Batman mythos in preparation for Legacy Of The Dark Knight which I can't wait to play! It was a very good birthday week and a very good show, I give this final season 3 stars, 8/10, and I'll see you very soon for Kombat.

Batman Beyond: Season 2

Boy we upped that episode count like nobody's business.

After a small but respectable 13 episodes in season 1 we jumped all the way to 26 making this the longest season of the show. And after paving the groundwork and setting up the world and characters logic would dictate we vastly expand upon it, which we simultaneously do and yet stick to a good bit of the same. I do strongly appreciate Terry has his own rogues gallery that keeps popping back up while still flourishing some original stories as well, they go kinda out there at times with a backstory episode with Ace, one of Terry's maidenless dweeb schoolmates gets a robo-girlfriend, one of the most fucking gruesome images in children's television is present as the villain early on in the season, we even get a telepathic almost spiritual predecessor to doomed child Ace from Justice League. The variety is strong and we even get a highly welcome addition to the cast in Max who I'm just gonna say it, is a much better candidate for Terry in a relationship than Dana and she's pretty rad as well! I'm right, no questions at this time! Though and I swear whenever I say this I'm not taking shots or giving this show shit I wanna preface that before I say, a lot if not even the overwhelming majority of the episodes this season have pretty...not lackluster but certainly very rushed resolutions. Now am I being a cataclysmic ass for kinda picking on the 22 minute cartoon from the turn of the millenia? Yes, without question. I cannot imagine how difficult it truly is to create a scenario, introduce a threat, make a memorable or compelling story, and have to wrap it up in less than half an hour and have it get gold stars every time. And YET, The Animated Series somehow did with even endings that erupted goosebumps along my body to this day just thinking about it. Maybe slight fatigue was setting in, or maybe the writers didn't have the time frame they needed to make this excellent television but instead very good television, and while indeed the very first time I sat down to watch this season I was game all the way through but right here right now I was taking much more notice of it. Is it absolutely show breaking and I'm gonna eviscerate this series with a flaming buzzsaw? No not at all, I still love the show, I was still engaging with the episodes and some even got big reactions out of me, you just have to acknowledge all the facets. But all the technicals from the animation which is still top notch, to the voice cast who commit lock stock and barrel to the performances, to the music which dear sweet tap dancing Christ was really on my radar this go around and I ain't got no problem saying I'd buy volumes of the score for this series it was that damn good, are on such firm standing much can be forgiven. To throw some favorites out for this season I point to Hidden Agenda which is our first true introduction to Max, Mind Games which has an almost Over The Edge vibe from the last season of The Animated Series to it, The Last Resort which got me raging hardcore at the villain who just reeks of evangelical child absuing pieces of dog shit that makes my skin crawl, and Ace In The Hole because hey I'm a sucker for a Great Dane and it's a compelling story. I like we get more of an expansion with Terry's love life, having Max be an ally who knows the secret is a nice and great shake up, seeing higher stakes in the plot feels like natural escalation, and the more teen after school metaphor episodes are few and far between. Even with it's slight shortcomings and questionable actions from characters on a regular basis, it's still a very very good show and I'll be damned if I said I didn't like it. All in all I give it 3 stars, 8/10, and thankfully next season will not take all flippin' day to finish.

Batman Beyond: Season 1

This has been coming for a long long time.

Pretty early on I knew I wanted to review The Animated Series and Batman Beyond but you would be surprised how long it actually took me to come around to this show. I have a fairly clear memory of when I was about 5 or 6 and my cousins were over and gonna watch Batman Beyond on Kids WB, and I said outright that I'll just stick to The Animated Series. Fast forward to the year 2011, the hype for Arkham City is unreal, and everybody is losing their shit hardcore over the Beyond skin for DLC whereas I was most stoked for the Dark Knight Returns and once again The Animated Series skin. And finally about 3 years later when I was in college I finally decided to know what this show was about and gave it a watch. I kind of have a track record with brushing off really damn good shows for significant amounts of time. So let's get this show on the road. Premiering in the year 1999 this show is a follow up to The New Batman Adventures following somewhat in the art direction style as we jump ahead to a cyberpunk futuristic rendition of Gotham as we meet high schooler Terry McGinnis who after a run in with a gang crosses paths with an elderly Bruce Wayne and kinda stumbles upon the secret under stately Wayne Manor, before taking up the cowl against Bruce's wishes until he's more or less "hired" for the job. This has such a stark and definitive look and style that is evident straight from the opening which is pretty kickass in my estimation and is easily one of the best intros to any animated show. They essentially took the goth out of gotham, it's all futuristic with flying cars, mega skyscrapers, and barely a dark alley to it's name yet I'm surprised how well it still works and I'd kill to have this Gotham in a game to play! Obviously the timeframe isn't stated lending to the more timeless aspect of this animated world but it's a solid shake up that I can see younger more novice viewers easily able to jump in and the older veterans can still dig as well. The animation is really nicely done feeling still akin to that turn of the millenium DC animated vibe but still retaining an identity of it's own, with a lot of blues and purples in play (the red sky is not even prevalent) which makes the batsuit and villains really pop. I now see why people rave about this suit, undeniably minimalistic and I'm just a sucker for red and black color combos, the ears I swing between looking stylistic and awesome or closer to bunny ears depending on the angle, but all the tech built into it and the wingspan are such cool attributes so I'm definitely a fan now. The music also is actually pretty fantastic, foregoing the themes of individual characters and villains but delivering a more metal edge at times, why people don't comment more on the score baffles me because I genuinely adored it! Now obviously I was quite young when this show was going on and I have no recollection as to the reaction and fandom that was there since day one, but people nowadays claim it as an underrated gem that was stuck in the shadow of it's Emmy award winning predecessor which isn't far from the mark. Comprising of only 13 episodes for this season it does a pretty remarkable job setting up all the world building details and character introductions, giving a small taste of what is to come. Will Friedle as Terry is a very very good lead, though still a teenager it never feels outlandish or dumb that he becomes the Batman and almost is a precursor to when Dick Grayson took up the cape and cowl in the comics years on down the road, he's more upbeat and jokey and has good chemistry with Bruce who takes on a stronger mentor role, he struggles with the balance of the identities, and you know he's still a kid who has more to learn in his years so it's never a case of seeing him act stupid and thinking he's insufferable. Of course Kevin Conroy (God rest his strong soul) is back and I almost feel I love him more in this role than any other time he has voiced The Batman, simply because it is so different and while he can still deck a fool he's more in the background of events taking on a more Oracle-ish role giving Terry support and information from the Batcave, and just seeing Bruce as this grumpy old man won me over quick. Not too many side characters at play here besisdes Terry's sweetheart Dana who thank God they just made them a couple already and didn't slip oh so easily into that will they/won't they on again off again relationship nonsense that plagues maaaany teen orientated shows, it just shows another aspect of how it's hard for Terry to maintain a stable life. The show takes on a severe episode of the week stance, this before animated shows became almost serialized with overarching plots and character development, with a few reoccuring villains as far as I know all made specifically for the show, the main one being Derek Powers who now owns the vast majority of Wayne Enterprises and hires the help of various supervillains to progress his schemes which comprise of shapeshifting blob woman Inque, technician and sound guy Shriek, he even has a hand in ressurecting Mr. Freeze. We got some independent evil doers as well including hypnotist and laziest robber ever Spellbinder, aristocratic card enthusiasts the Royal Flush Gang, and The Fantastic Four. How DC did not get sued over that is a mystery for another day, stretch armstrong dude, translucent lady woman, and a literal flaming beast of a man, kinda on the nose there guys! Thankfully no bad epsiodes to speak of or a shred of filler, if I had to pick favorites here I'd go with the opening two parter Rebirth or Mr. Freeze's return in Meltdown. And for not even a 5 hour sit it's well worth it for this season. I give it 3.5 stars, 8.5/10!

Super Mario Galaxy Movie

Well I'll be damned.

I liked it way better than the first! Pretty much every aspect has been improved and the lore has been expanded, the hallmarks of any good sequel are present here. So the story goes after Princess Rosalina has been captured our plumbing brothers and the princess in another castle set out to free her while Bowser reconnects with his son in dastardly deeds. That's the base story but trust me you get a lot of cool stuff along with it. I feel the animators are just showing off in this, if you thought the first film was beatific and colorful to the max throw in the cosmic aspect and it's peaked at a whole other level in my opinion. Performance wise from our original roster they all do great and I'm happy Luigi gets more to do, and I was quite invested in Bowser's storyline, and as for our new arrivals I knew Brie Larson was gonna rock it as Rosalina and Donald Glover was a unique choice for Yoshi but welcome just the same. The plot moves just as brisk as the first and never ever gets boring with maybe not as much easter eggs you can shake a stick at but some surprise reveals that more than make up for it. In fact one particular reveal nearly pushed me to scream in the theater, as they are my main choice in the Super Smash Bros. games. But I like all the nods to Super Mario Bros. 2, or should I really say Doki Doki Panic for those who are initiated and getting to see stuff I'm actually surprised wasn't in the first. It's a very fun and I'd easily say funnier movie as well, with an easy to grasp plot, damn good animation, and come what may if they decide to do a third they will have my attention. I give it 3 stars, 8/10, and I really gotta check the upcoming releases for this month and see what else might strike my fancy.