Thursday, June 8, 2017

The Mummy Tomb Of The Dragon Emperor

No wonder it took 7 years to make this friggin' movie!

Sweet Jesus I am having severe flashbacks to Pirates. Not a good start. I don't feel like recounting the plot! Blah, blah, blah, ancient evil, drama, betrayal, curses, evil wakes up. Rick and company got to deal with it. Same old shit. Though it is awfully nice to change it up from Ancient Egypt to Ancient China. It does a bit more in terms of how powerful the villain is. But honestly setting it after World War 2 barely does anything. So strike one, familiar plot to Pirates. Strike two, Rachel Weisz could not reprise her role and it hurts the film majorly in my eyes, cause she made that character and seeing someone else in the role feels incredibly wrong. And strike three, they bring motherf***ing yetis in this movie!!! Are you high?? Just...just why? Congratulations, the Mummy trilogy has jumped the shark! Ugh, God. One shining star, the silver lining in these dark clouds is Michelle Yeoh. She is awesome! She raises an undead army to fight stone soldiers! I'm so in admiration of her it's not hardly real. Needless to say she is my favorite character. Oh yeah, and they totally wasted Jet Li as the Dragon Emperor. Thank you so much for that. You know, I heard that the new Mummy movie isn't that great but boy howdy let me tell you something, it can't be worse than this. Like it is going to rock my socks off compared to this! And I can't wait. A shared world with the Universal Monsters? Dream come true for me. And we'll talk about that tomorrow.

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