The Book Of Clarence

It's an interesting experience to watch this movie.

Now speaking as a non-religious individual who was raised in a christian centric background, I'm not the one to determine if this is a good religious film. But I can tell you if I thought this was a good film or not. Split into three acts or Books in this instance the story follows an atheistic everyman at the height of Jesus' influence who seeks to make something of himself, and tries to pay off some debts being a charlatan messiah. That's pure bare bones and a fair bit happens, but I like the more imaginative and revisionist (Perhaps?) history stance the film takes. Now will I admit that the movie has a tremendous tone problem? Yeah. The humor barely hits and it mainly focuses on being a drama, so when those moments occur it doesn't work great. But when the drama and the big moments hit, I mean it's harrowing at times and hits you like a damn frieght train! I really couldn't say enough good things honestly about this cast, and finally we see a black Jesus. Sorry to break it to you humans, but an israeli born man in the city of David that resides in Jerusalem is not going to be wonderbread white. LaKeith Stanfield is a rock solid lead as wannabe apostle Clarence, and I find it kinda brilliant to make him an atheist at that period of history in 33 A.D. and the character journey that unfolds does not feel slapdash, stupid, or insulting. Great stuff! RJ Cyler, my friggin' man from the recent Power Rangers movie how great it is to see him in another film as Clarence's partner in crime Elijah, he gets his moments of humor and emotion and sells it being a stalwart friend to the end. And I will not lie to you for even a second, I didn't think we were going to see Jesus in this movie or at least his face anyway but when that moment comes and it is a powerful ass moment, and I looked in the face of Nicholas Pinnock the only words I could form were, "Holy fuck that is Jesus of Nazareth.". I'm so not even kidding, I bought every second of it, he did such a great job and you barely even see him in the movie! That's talent. Anna Diop as Clarence's sweetheart Varinia though more of a side character gives humanity and groundness to his character, seeing past his scoundrel qualities and admiring the man underneath. Personally I think he has terrific taste, the woman has a good head on her shoulders, is charming and caring, and shockingly gorgeous without a doubt. I actually will admit though my absolute favorite characters are Joseph and Mary, they're in the movie for one scene but I absolutely adored them and they made me have a good laugh, so Alfre Woodard and Brian Bovell have my absolute love. The film looks pretty dang good too, I mean I don't think they genuinely filmed in Jerusalem but it coulda fooled me, the costumes are great, the effects for the more miraculous stuff do the job, and the makeup is a little too good at points. But the interesting part is how my perception changed as the movie went on. Book I, I think the movie is completely middle of the road average aside from the production values. Book II, I'm kinda getting into it and near the end I feel the movie is decent. Book III, alright it's a good film. I don't think I've ever had that kind of movie watching experience in my life! So if you think you're not feeling the movie before the halfway point just stick with it. It was fascinating watching the number rise as the movie kept playing but what did it end on? I think a solid 3 stars, 7.5/10! So not a bad stint at the movies but oh we got one more, a movie I saw in my downtime that was too good not to talk about. What could it be? You'll have to see.

IT: Chapter Two

Okay, they did pretty good.

I still feel the best adaptation of IT was the first half of this story, the 90s mini-series is decent but the first chapter I guess we call it was the best. Now that's not to say this second chapter is bad, I really enjoyed the cast and did feel like those would be the grown ups of our young actors, they did good! I infinitely enjoyed and appreciated the way they handled the second half and more importantly the ending than the mini-series, but more on that later. So our story is much of the same, kids keep disappearing in the town hardly anyone leaves Derry which leads Mike to phone up the Loser's Club to come back and tie up some loose ends, as our cast reconnects and in a clever but underplayed way have to reach back into the past and uncover more than they remember. I absolutely love how they handled the flashbacks though brief they are, they show additional scenes with the young actors after important events have happened in the previous movie and thus you see more of their character and dilemmas as an audience along with the characters. Plus it all ties in the end, where our heroes face Pennywise more on almost metaphysical plane with some straight up Doctor Strange camera movements, editing, and action, it gets a little trippy but it's wonderfully put together! Obviously they have to attack Pennywise but I love the fact they have to gather actual physical pieces of their past in order to defeat him, I know everybody is going to throw McGuffin at this but I see a bit deeper into it. They reach back into their memories of the past, creating feelings of nostalgia but because the last movie was so much more the nostalgia dripped throwback film with references everywhere it's more underplayed and it's there for story purposes than, ooohhhh 80s stuff!!! That's something I appreciate. But something I appreciate more is Mr. Skarsgard himself, we see Pennywise a lot more in this movie, more scenes, more dialogue, a lot of him in broad daylight to show he's more confident than ever to claim victims, and of course he is a joy to watch. However! He was so damn enjoyable he kinda hurt the film for me, we all know he can shapeshift and change into various things, but I just didn't care that much for the various scary imagery in this movie. Do you know why? It's a super secret secret but I'll tell you anyway. Are you listening? Are you listening? Listen good. Because the majority of scares are godforsaken jumpscares!! Jesus fish, there is so many jumpscares that if I had a dollar for everyone I would have enough money to see every last new movie coming out this year. It gets old and it gets old quick. The only effective scares I got where with the flip flappin' dancing clown! Probably because Bill is an awesome actor and can make you feel uneasy and genuinely creeped out. I don't care about the stripping granny, I don't care about the leper, I do not care about the giant lumberjack statue. Send in the clowns! When I can make a joke about the reason this movie is 3 hours long is because you pad it with so many jumpscares, maybe you put too many in. It's the sad state of affairs for horror movies in this day and age, why do you think I praised It Follows so much? Because while the movie does have jumpscares it rarely used them, it didn't need to use them because the concept itself is actually scary and there was a constand mood of dread and helplessness. That just isn't here with the horror. And I regret to report that much like the first movie it has a hard time juggling comedy and horror, and it's actually funny! The writing is good! But right after suffering another jumpscare you throw a joke out there, it doesn't help relieve the burst of tension it just sort of falls flat. That was the one bad thing about the first movie, it couldn't juggle horror and comedy well together, now on seperate scenes with just the main characters the comedy shines, and when it's one on one with the kids the horror also works. It is so difficult to mix two such elements, many people can't get it so I won't ever hold it against the filmmaker. I genuinely liked the final confrontation, it was something different than the first movie and the finale of the mini-series, they really played their cards right and the conclusion actually made total sense. Yes even with the weird spider thing it worked like a charm! If you genuinely hated the finale of the original you have got to check out this movie, I really think you will appreciate and enjoy it. The movie was good do not get me wrong, I just had issues of my own but I know other people can look past it and enjoy this movie as much as the first. I mean for God's sake you kinda already have to see the damn movie if you sat through the first, so I know I'm preaching to the choir here but this is for mainly sharing opinions on the film than a question of rather you should see it or not. You shouldn't watch The Room or Troll 2 but sweet Christmas is it a blast to talk about with friends. So yes, you are no doubt going to see it if you haven't already but for those who might need some reassurance, definitely check it out. 3 stars, 7/10, thumbs up from me! But now the question is who will be the clown of the year? Well check back with me in about a month and we shall find out.

Next week....who knows? I'm still planning it. Bye!

In Retrospect: Glass

This has been a long time coming.

My problem with Glass is the way it ends. The rest of the movie is done very very well, the acting is great, the cinematography and editing is utilized to it's full potential, I appreciate what it means and the events of the film. However! You could have ended it leaps and bounds better. And you know what the sickest part is? I knew exactly what Shyamalan was going for, I completely and totally get the ending. But I, along with many other people have concluded that it fell flat. I had to see this movie again because I was practically radiating rage walking out of that theater so we gotta talk superheroes and the ending so hunker down y'all and avoid everything I say from this point on if you still haven't seen the movie. Okay? Okay. I fully understand the intent of the director, that the mantle of superheroes does not begin and end with our three main characters and that they inspire the future, and more so the fact that it underwhelms the audience with the way it ends. I've been hearing a lot of use of the term "subverting expectations" pretty much since The Last Jedi, I've never heard of it before until then and people started talking about it. This movie does that, they don't end the movie with a grand gesture, a limited edition story with a standoff on top of the tallest building in the city for all to see their extrodinary abilities, but a shocking hard cut that kills every one of our main characters. By this supposed secret organization that has been systematically eradicating superpowered people for over 10,000 years! Did I also mention this organization, or cult, or whatever the flying purple people eating bullshit this is was introduced in the movie, with and I'm not kidding, 21 minutes left in the movie. MINUTES! You don't know their name, or anything about them. And the reason they give is the most misguided pig shit I have ever heard in my life! To justify their actions they claim that "there cannot be gods amongst us" and because it's "not fair." Just....

Okay. I am not saying this is what Shyamalan believes, but I am saying this nonsense cult has no reason to be in the movie and are misguided fools. Allow me to part some wisdom that I have known for years now. Superheroes are the modern day equivalent of medieval knights, specifically the King Arthur knights. They go out and do good, might FOR right, compassion is not weakness, strength is not vital, and the best superhero comics of all time reinforce that. Where they rise above, and protect, and help others. They can inspire greatness in everyone. Superman is known all over the world, his S symbol is the second most known symbol behind the christian cross! And yet even other heroes can do that same thing, illicit that same response, that's why people will say Aquaman, or Black Panther, or Spawn, or any other comic book character is their favorite. They can identify and grow through that hero. It's not that kid power fantasy that so many assume it is, it can go deeper than that. So why not go through with the limited edition story we were promised? They throw the two nurses in the back of the van, drive off to the tower, David is in pursuit, they tear through the tower and get to the roof, there's helicopter cameras all over the place, Elijah is on the loudspeakers doing his thing, David squares off against The Beast, the world sees their amazing feats while Elijah tells the world how he did it all, then David remembers overhearing Kevin's name, uses it against him and throws him off the tower! Kevin dies, then David has to take Elijah in as the world is aghast, Elijah is put behind bars, The Overseer goes undercover while keeping an eye on Mr. Glass and various individuals are inspired to use their amazing gifts for good or for evil. But no! Some nameless assholes shoot Kevin and drown David, and poor Elijah's ribs get crushed by The Beast. I mean, the showoff happened but not at the new tower and it ruins these characters! I was enraged because these characters died, and in really honorless, pathetic, and underwhelming ways and they deserved better. That shows how well they were written and acted because you wanted so much more of them! To see them just offed in such a shitty way makes you upset, and I get that was the intent but was it in best interest of the film series? Through the credits they show a collage of scenes from all the movies signifying those were stepping stones to a bigger picture. And this was it! The buildup and exchanges were done so well, but the payoff felt like you were getting two big middle fingers shoved straight up your ass! Maybe my ending I pitched was too obvious or something(?) but you could imagine that stuff going down with these characters and how awesome and well done it would have been! This series desperately needs a good comic book running where they just take these movie characters and write original stories for them and maybe incorporate this organization and build upon them and give us a 10/10 ending. You could even keep Elijah's knowledge and commentary on comic books for a healthy dose of meta. Up yours Wade Wilson! Totally do that, it'd be better than this intentional anti-climatic betryal of these characters! It's just sad man. I'm happy I'm moving on.

And next week, starting Sunday it's time we talk about one of the best series based off the best movie series ever even to this day!

Glass

Well damn it, I wasn't expecting that.

I've never felt so jaded toward a movie. Glass was really good but it pissed me off too, this was the other end of the extreme, I was getting hyped and really liked the movie but it didn't end the way I wanted it. I know that is ridiculous, but hey man when you get jaded something had to happen to your emotions. In fact, that's a great thing! This movie got me all wound up and got some blood coursing through my veins, and it has been awhile since that last happened. It really did deliver everything I wanted, so this movie takes place I don't even think 6 months after Split. David has started a sort of homebrew crime fighting career, I mean we've seen tons of super rich heroes start out but we've never really seen a realistic no budget crime fighter so that was neat, but David soon comes into contact with Kevin and they confront and are taken to a psychiatric hospital where they along with Elijah are treated to believe their superpowers are imagined. We all know they are not so that makes the head of this hospital an absolute tool who I hate with every fibre of my body, it doesn't slow the movie down because the characters are still interesting and their interactions are a joy to see. So the movie is really good and if you asked me which is the best....maybe Split but this was the culmination of it all so it probably will win out for me. Will this movie hit the top 10 of this year? We shall see but for the first new movie of the new year, we're off to a strong start.

Split

Well. That was interesting.

That's the word I would describe Split, interesting. This is an interesting film, centering around 3 teenage girls who are abducted by a man with multiple personality disorder, accumulating 23 personalities that the girls must try to use in order to escape. And just like Unbreakable it has a very fascinating premise before anything even happens. A thriller based around a person with multiple personalities is a film idea that I don't think I've ever come across, at least not off the top of my head so it already won brownie points for originality. But then the movie goes and goes, and another thing I noticed in this movie like Unbreakable is this continuous mystery that builds and builds to a fantastic reveal. No discredit to the other actors in this movie, but this movie would be hard to do without James McAvoy, I mean he gets it and if he didn't win awards for this, I'm gonna be upset! He changes on a dime and it is amazing to watch, he pulls off every persona, he's a joy to watch in...several ways, it's a great performance. And I'm sure lots of praise has been given to Anya Taylor-Joy who plays the main girl Casey, but there was a lot to her character and she was so interesting to watch because she seems and is in fact a very damaged character and thus acts like an outsider even in this heavy situation, I'm not sure if we will see her again but I will be looking out for her cause she did good. It was a shock to know that Shyamalan actually got the cinematographer from It Follows, this guy just really knows how to film uncomfortable, stressful, and scary situations and make it look good while doing so so that was a treat. Just all these elements complimented an interesting and creepy story and I'm even more hyped to see what will come of Glass, just to see what they do with these characters and this world they built. So join me next time for our final(?) foray into the Unbreakable world.

In Retrospect: Atomic Blonde

You know it takes a lot for a spy thriller to keep holding your attention once you know how it all ends, but thankfully this movie does it well.

Yes, Atomic Blonde is still a fantastic movie that I would gladly buy and own for the rest of my life. Charlize Theron carries the whole movie, and she does a phenomenal job. Honestly if they announced her as the next 007, I really wouldn't mind that much! She gets the ever living hell beat out of her and she still comes into combat with all piss and vinegar, nobody and I will stand by this, has ever been beat down as much as her and yet she still fights back and wins. Pick any movie. Any protagonist. They don't even get a scratch on them compared to her. Jesus God almighty Charlize is the queen! The action is done so incredibly well utilizing slick and quick editing, while still giving the audience a wide view of the action so you can appreciate the choreography and brutal fighting displayed. The espionage element is still very good, with alliances, betrayal, and twists to keep it interesting. And of course, Sofia Boutella. Ohhhh my yes. Movie's perfect! It's perfect! Buy it, that is all. But in all seriousness, she is the cherry on top of this awesome movie. Just every aspect of it is so well executed. Story is very good, characters are interesting, action is exhilarating, the mystery is intriguing, the soundtrack is kick ass, it's just a really good movie! I was so happy to see it again, because I knew I was in for a blast and I highly enjoyed it as I did the first time. Although mind you, it wasn't an easy movie to watch with my mom. Cause she wanted to see the movie, and when it got a little...ahem, steamy, oh dear. Cause you remember how I described those scenes, and it really has not changed in terms of uncomfortableness, like I still feel like I am watching full on hardcore adult movie. Just....God. Beyond that though, very good movie! I might die tomorrow from massive consumption of food, but at least I will die happy and fed. So I'm okay with that. And if I live, I get to run around and breathe in the chaos of Black Friday, so it's win-win. And next week we will have lots to talk about...

Atomic Blonde

I friggin' called the use of 99 LuftBalloons. I mean come on, it's Germany in 1989. We're going to hear some Nena.

Atomic Blonde, a brash, vibrant, and pretty kickass spy film has just hit today and it sure does need to be seen. So the story takes place about a month before the Berlin Wall is torn down with a british agent sent in to East Berlin to retrieve a list of all the agents in the world before it gets in the hands of the KGB. And then a lot happens that you come to expect in spy movies, action scenes, double crosses, and of course the more....ahem, steamy scenes. But Atomic Blonde does takes these normal conventions and puts a new spin on it, and not just due to that we have a female spy this time. The action scenes are visceral, they're brutal, I mean Charlize Theron gets the piss kicked out of her and she still hits back hard. The spy and espionage element is there but not heavily centered on. This movies does fully deserve the R rating so obviously it's not for everyone. The violence is in your face and doesn't shy away from kills, the sex is in my opinion kind of unnecesary. I mean your following the story and then Sofia Boutella and Charlize Theron participate in lesbiaonics, and while I love Sofia Boutella I just felt the sex and nudity wasn't there for a reason other than for someone to get their rocks off. And really that's the only bad thing I can say about the movie. The cinematography is friggin' blasting with color when in the right scene, and looks fantastic. All the acting is good with James McAvoy being an ass like he always is, but my God he is terrific at it. Charlize Theron has got a bad attitude in this movie, like she is just not a nice lady. Is she great in those action scenes? Uhhhh.....yeah!! But her character is very unlikable, for about 90% of the movie, not until the end am I fully behind her and want to see her get stuff done. Sofia Boutella who is my new golden girl, is just a treat to see in the movie so I'm all for it. And one thing I don't ever think I mentioned is I love period pieces, not like Victorian era dramas or anything like that but more specifically, seeing a part of the world in that time. Another spy movie example I can throw out there is You Only Live Twice, just seeing Japan in that time period, in the late 60s was really awesome. So seeing Berlin split between East and West in that time period was very interesting. I certainly don't have to tell you I LOVE this soundtrack! I'm a lover of this decade of music above all others, a close second being 60s rock, and even beyond the excellent choice in musical tracks the original music created and used in this movie is really good! Like buy the soundtrack good! It fits right in with the feel and style of the movie. I walked in expecting a decent, if not great spy movie and I got a great spy movie! So if it sounds like your kinda movie, definitely go watch it.

Well that's it for this week. But what now? What comes next? Well.....tomorrow I'll tell you.

Arthur Christmas

Now we start December proper.

The growing Christmas cult film that I have heard so much about and have finally watched. How was it? Pretty darn good. Arthur Christmas is a wonderful animated film done by the same folks who gave us Hotel Transylvania, follows the family of Claus as they soon discover after another flawless night of delivering presents that a child has been missed. This springs letter counter Arthur to travel across the globe to deliver the final present with the help of his grandad. Where do I start? So much to talk about. First off, the animation is great, it is fast paced, fluid, and works beautifully with the film. Sony Pictures Animation knows how to make animated movies so well! Second, I just love the idea behind it all, that there has been generation after generation of Claus delivering presents to all the children from Saint Nicholas onward, and we get three generations of Santa's. We have Grandsanta voiced by Bill Nighy as the more traditional and old fashioned Santa of them all, red suit and hat, sleigh and reindeer, the thing you think of first when it comes to Santa Claus. Then we have the current Santa voiced by Jim Broadbent, in charge who is one of the best Santa potrayals ever done in film, he is sweet, loves his job, but sadly has memory problems which is forcing him to retire, and that is truly sad because you see how much this job means to him, he tries his hardest to do good. And lastly, we have the current generation, Steve and Arthur, Steve voiced by the outstanding Hugh Laurie is more technology orientated, and militarized catapulting the elf's into becoming more like special force operatives than the elf's who just make toys. While Arthur voiced by James McAvoy, is a bit of a clutz but you can see in his eyes that Christmas is life, he answers all the children's letters to Santa, has nothing but a heart of gold, and is willing to do anything to make sure children have a perfect Christmas. This creates dynamics that mix and collide in the movie, that make it that more great. And I have to commend the fact that there is no bad guy in this movie, true you may not fully agree with people's perception of how Christmas should be done, but there is no wrong way to do it. They all state how Christmas should be done, and you can see it either way. Whether it's delivering presents in a sleigh led by reindeer, down a chimney and placed under a tree, or by a spaceship with elf's covertly placing every present in the world. I just love this movie for that kind of premise alone, not even counting the humor, the characters, and the love of Christmas present. This is a Christmas classic in my eyes, right up there with It's A Wonderful Life or A Christmas Story. If you want a truly different yet familiar Christmas movie, you couldn't choose a better one than this. It's a lot of fun, and might make you look at the big guy in the red suit a little bit different.