Bruce Almighty

Probably been longer than 10 years since I've seen this.

Has time aged a film almost 2 decades old? God only knows but I'll tell you what I think anyway. I had no clue whatsoever this movie even existed until one day either my mom or my Nan handed the DVD to me, and me still being the young and enthusuastic Jim Carrey fan I was, I immediately went for it. A movie where Jim Carrey was God, I mean he wasn't that far off when I was younger and I enjoyed it a lot. Looking back, I still had a good time with it but I will admit I didn't love it as much. Not to say the story isn't a very good and interesting one, with a news reporter who feels very down on his luck and left behind in the dust is contacted by the Almighty who grants him all of the heavenly powers to see if he can do better. A fascinating concept, albeit a very predictable because ohhh our main character is a human, a very fallable, kinda self centered, average human. Of course he would use such power for entirely selfish reasons but something I applaud in the writing is not only the fact that Bruce isn't a complete ass and totally irredeemable, but his actions as an all powerful figure have consequences almost from the start. Any other film would just brush it off and not even acknowledge that oh yeah if he made the moon that big, the oceans would go mental, and all that stuff. Well done. In fact there really isn't a real antagonistic force in the movie, apart from perhaps human hubris and being vain. But it's great to see a movie confront that in some sense. Jim Carrey though not as hilarious in other films gives a good performance, balancing jokes and body humor akin to Ace Ventura and The Mask to more serious and dramatic points like Truman Show and Eternal Sunshine, and yes I could tie reference string to all those and more within his filmography. Jennifer Aniston though not as prevalent as I would like or as grand as she is in more recent years is great to see and sells everything beautifully. Morgan Freeman, I'm not saying a word. No really, there is no point, we all know it. You know it, I know it, your great-great-grandparents know it, your unborn children know it. I will however bring up a certain discussion point, what about this performance wowed so many people? Because I'm fairly certain if you flat out asked people what do you think God looks like, I think a good chunk of them unironically would say Morgan Freeman. There's a reason they gave him the host duties of a show called The Story Of God. I rest my case. Now, this is where I act kinda like a dick. You know that scene, probably the most famous scene of the movie when Bruce makes Evan have a verbal meltdown on the news? I think that's breaking one of exactly two rules set for him by God, don't tell anyone you're God and don't mess with free will. He is messing with free will! He might as well have shoved his hand up Evan's backside like a puppet, I call plothole. 3/10! But in all seriousness, it's a decent movie that has good stuff in it and even if you're not slightly resembling a religious person can still enjoy it a fair bit. We all know the best part, and I'm happy such a thing came to pass. 3 stars, 7.5/10! And I will not be reviewing Evan Almighty tomorrow but something a lot more different from a television writer I enjoy a great deal.

Unforgiven

Told you I'd be eating my words.

Now obviously to compare Tombstone and Unforgiven is difficult and unfair, they are two very different movies with very different qualities to appreciate. And it's not really the film you would expect when reading a synopsis of the plot, with an aging gunslinger teaming up with his old partner and a young man to essentially kill two cowboys who cut up a woman of the oldest profession in the world. It sounds like a revenge plot, and well you all know how I feel about revenge. You'd expect a good deal of action, some chases, typical actiony kind of stuff with a big climax and a happy resolution. That is far, far from what you get. Unforgiven is a western movie that takes it's time, has discussions, and actually severely looks down on any gunplay. Hell I have to give a lot of respect and have a lot of admiration for the film to have that kind of message. Every one of our main characters has a solid moment where they fully emotionally express their desire not to kill anyone. And for those people who didn't like the movie because of the deglorifying opinion on guns, and the lack of action well then you missed the point entirely of the story. All the acting here is very good, you could almost say it's understated. With Clint being an outlaw who has been out of the saddle for years and can't even shoot that well or wants no part of any bad deeds is not only appreciated for the uniqueness but just how he plays this part, very reserved and you can see a lot of the history and pain of the character on his face. Gene Hackman has one of the most morally grey characters in cinema, because he's a lawman who's trying to keep order in a town and you see kind of a retirement angle with him building a house and being up there in age, and yet he really abuses his power and beats the shit out of people. But he's not a ruthless guy, it's such a hard character to pin but he plays it wonderfully. Morgan Freeman, spoiler alert, is great and honestly has the second best bit of acting in this movie, again in correlation with how he feels about guns and killing. The movie is a bit slow until you meet his character then you get more invested and engaged. Jaimz Woolvett has the best piece of acting in the film near the end, and again he doesn't play this bastard shooter, he talks a big game and could be seen as bloodthirsty but how the events of the film play out it doesn't show a single character in a positive light. It's not a morbid, highly depressing, or even just a bit of a downer film, it makes you think. I mean really think about the choices and fallout if you ever pull a trigger, and I'm not honestly surprised that the same person who wrote this film also wrote Blade Runner, introspective and thoughtful writing is something he is damn good at. Now I said awhiles back that Once Upon A Time In The West is my favorite western ever, and Unforgiven is mighty close to that. The writing is spot on, the shots in this movie regarding scenery is unbelievable, the cast is excellent, it's so worth the time to watch. 4 stars, 8.5/10, see you later on down the road this Friday.

The Dark Knight Rises

It's time for Knightfall.

The end is here. All those years, all his enemies, and the Bat was broken. But he came back, 8 years of nothing before Bane comes to Gotham and took the city, making it a no man's land. And the Dark Knight came out of retirement to take control of his city. Was it worthwhile? Was it a brilliant end to an iconic trilogy? Well here's the thing, answers don't give you a sense of satisfaction, sometimes you have to brace yourself for disappointment. I mean, think about it! You've seen this series since it began, the birth of the Batman, the crazy and chaotic Joker pushing him to his limits, and then bang! The ultimate fight for Gotham ensues and ends. Would you be happy? Does it make sense? How come the true villain sucked ass? Well, let's start at the beginning. 8 years since the Batman has been seen, and not all is well. True, Gotham seems to be in a time of peace but Bane has different plans, severing all ties to the outside world and keeping Gotham in his pocket thanks to a four megaton nuclear bomb. He broke the bat, threw him in a pit, and is about to do what Ra's Al Ghul was always planning: destroy Gotham. And hell, that's just the brief basic synopsis. Good gravy is there a lot going on in this movie! What with Bane controlling the city, Bats coming out of retirement, Catwoman doing her own thing, and poor Jimbo scrambling to restore order, it's a miracle you remember what happened in the first movie! But specifics are key here, and really there isn't much to talk about casting and production wise, except for Anne Hathaway as Selina Kyle. Great job guys! I thought she was awesome! Now I think the problem many people did not get was this is NOT a Batman story. At all. It's a Bruce Wayne story. It deals with him coming out of retirement, defending a city that hates and fears him, and just him trying to do one last good deed in his lifetime. This is important to know if you choose to see it again. Now onto the villains! Bane is damn near pitch perfect, I mean Tom Hardy friggin' nailed it. This is the comic book Bane, and for those of you who read the comics know what I am talking about, he's brilliant, super genius intellect almost, incredible strength, military backing in some cases, this guy is a true force to be reckoned with. He broke Batman's back, no one has ever hurt him like that before. This shows a capable villain who is a great character in and of himself. But then they done screwed it up! I have no qualms spoiling this, because it's absurdly obvious to the comic book fans, and means precisely nothing to those who want to just watch the movie. The whole mastermind behind all this is Talia Al Ghul, Ra's daughter. Thanks for taking away such excellent menace from Bane and just pissing me off! Seriously?? What the shit is she doing here??? There's no reason!! None! Whatsoever! The character is meaningless, she doesn't even reveal her name until about 15 minutes before the end! Are you fraking kidding me?! This movie is 2 HOURS AND 45 MINUTES LONG!!! God I hate her in this movie, now you might be saying "But Dude that's the point! You're not supposed to like her! She's the bad guy!" but that is not the point! You built up an incredible villain, faithful to the comics, with a damn fine performance, and just chucked it all in to the fraking trash! I knew her whole schtick once she babbled on about having balance or order or some bullshit in the world for the 8 millionth godforsaken time! Also, worst death ever! Oh yeah, she dies. Not in a even slightly satisfactory way! It is literally, the worst on screen death I have ever seen! I mean for Christ's sake, that was the best take you could get?? It's horrible! Oh my God! How do you do this man? Besides that....disgustingly horrible aspect, the rest of the movie is fine. When I first saw it I found it very underwhelming because I didn't want it to end, but you know, it's been 5 years, and the movie has grown on me. I like the scale of the movie, the tone of the movie, (most) of the characters in the movie, the action is very good, the drama hits hard and by the way, shame on you Bruce! You made Alfred cry! That ain't right man! It's a perfectly fine ending to The Dark Knight Trilogy, they just done fraked it up in terms of villains. In fact, just watch the How It Should Have Ended video of this movie, if you don't feel like sitting down for almost 3 HOURS! There are movies that warrant that run time, this one....not so much. I can totally get why someone would not want to sit through a movie like this for that long. But honestly when I sat down, it took about 20 minutes for me to get interested and then the rest of the movie pretty much flew right by. But then again, I am used to such run times. 3 hours is a powerful repellent to the uninitiated, but we are initiated aren't we? The ending pissed people off too, I frankly didn't mind. I mean damn, it's all gone now, we got Batfflec and all these new kickass superhero movies coming out, so get over it! Oh, and The Joker totally called it. He was right about everything. That's why we love you Heath! But anyway, I'm done. New reviews next month, you know the drill, thank you so much for reading and I need some ice cream cake now. Happy Birthday to me, The Dude reminding you that the movie reviews will never die.

The Dark Knight

And...here we go!

What can I say? The Dark Knight is not just an amazing superhero movie but also an amazing movie in general. I saw it not once, not twice, but 3 times in theaters and surprise! I love it. The story is great, picking up about a year after Batman Begins with Bats facing off with The Joker for the first time and subsequently brought to his breaking point. Now let's just get this out of the way, Heath Ledger is outstanding and far worthy for his Academy Award. I mean, I thought Jack Nicholson was pitch perfect, ha ha ha ho hee ha ha and I thought my jokes were bad. Heath blows Jack out of the water, and that a stiff fraking order! Top Jack Nicholson as The Joker! Almost an impossible feat but he did it!! Don't know how, don't even care, cause I love him. Now moving on, Aaron Eckhart is Harvey Dent and he is great, bringing my absolute favorite Batman villain to the screen, though I do admit I wish I saw more of him, quite like Scarecrow in the previous movie. Maggie Gyllenhaal as Rachael Dawes......oh lord, I thank you for this good performance and for not having Katie back. Truly you have great wisdom. Thank you! And everybody in supporting cast is still kickass and I love seeing them again as these characters. Now for the more, intricate parts. I thought Chicago looked good in the first movie, I mean it looks absurdly great, it adds much more scale, and depth, and it looks glorious. Action scenes have improved by leaps and bounds, and I am so thankful for that! The dialogue, oh boy the dialogue, it's just as good. Hell in fact, I enjoyed this movie so much more than ever before due to one single scene and the actions of the characters afterwards. Jim Gordon's "death". Wow, I mean you don't buy into it cause, how do you kill Jim? It cannot be done! But really take a step back and look at how people react to it. For all intensive purposes, Jim Gordon is dead. How does Batman take it? He...snaps, almost killing people because he wants The Joker because he killed his friend, his partner in crimefighting. How does Harvey take it? He holds a guy at gunpoint, threatning to blow his brains out all due on a coin toss. Damn. That adds so much more character, and even more when they discover he is alive. That speaks volumes about how they viewed each other. And when it comes down to the wire, and the suspense and drama hit, it packs an explosive punch. Top notch direction, acting, editing, and cinematography in these scenes. The Tumbler, which a lot of people didn't see as a true Batmobile gets demolished and thus we get the Bat Pod, which looks awesome and many people liked more. And now we reach the ending, and so many people complained about, "Why not blame The Joker for all the deaths? Why does Batman have to take the fall?" and well, The Joker is an easy way out. They knew the direction they wanted to go in the next movie, and they set that up. No question about it. That part was essential in the making of the last movie, which of course we will look at to cap the week off. All in all, great movie, need to see it if you haven't already, and soon the legend ends....or does it?

Batman Begins

Well it's birthday week again, so screw it. Let's finish the Batman movies!

The first of The Dark Knight trilogy, how is it after 10 long years? It's a great start, it builds the world it wants, executes an origin story on a more realistic setting, and kickstarted the most acclaimed Batman movies ever made. Do I need to spout off the plot? Well just so I can talk more, absolutely. Bruce Wayne has been missing for several years, training with a mysterious organization known as the League of Shadows, and returns to Gotham City to fight crime and reclaim his city. But the League has a few tricks up it's sleeve, including the first live action potrayal of The Scarecrow, easily one of my top 5 Batman villains played brilliantly by Cillian Murphy who has a helping hand in the destruction of Gotham. I won't give much else away, but believe me when I say it's a great movie. Now onto the cast! Christian Bale on first viewing for me, was nothing special. But as I grew older, and started appreciating the story and the characters more, he does a fine job. As Bruce Wayne, he is cool and unassuming and as the Dark Knight, he is a force to be reckoned with. Supporting cast ranges from perfection to what the flying hell were they thinking. Michael Caine as Alfred? Fan-flipping-tastic! Very difficult to replace Michael Gough, but he puts his all into it. Gary Oldman as Jim Gordon is terrific, well that's pretty much Gary Oldman in general. Morgan Freeman as Lucius Fox? A more unknown character, hell Morgan was an avid reader of the Batman comics and didn't know who he was, but still very likable and entertaining. It's God for crying out loud, how can you say bad things about him? Alright, Liam Neeson as Ra's Al Ghul.....he's not terrible, but didn't really feel like Ra's. Plus I hate how they pronounced his name, I know that's nitpicking but it seriously gets irritating after awhile. He plays the part well but it just felt off, character wise not performance wise. Katie Holmes as Rachael Dawes. Good God, she is bad in this. I'm not bashing on Katie Holmes but she sucks in this. Her character is just so boring! There's no development, no depth, she just acts kinda bitchy and there you go, there's her character! Might as well wrap up the rest of the negatives while I'm at it. The fight scenes are horrendous, they are so closely shot, so fast with motion, it is almost fundamentally impossible to tell what is happening. And that's kind of an important part of a superhero movie, where you know...people fight crime! I don't know what they were thinking but at least they learned. Also, criminal underuse of Scarecrow, Christopher Nolan is a cerebral filmmaker so I expected Scarecrow to be a terrifying force, front and center of the whole film, main villain being awesome. But nope. Cillian Murphy gets to be Scarecrow for maybe five minutes, and he is great! He is awesome! I fully believe this is a guy who experiments on people with fear toxin! Spot on acting sir! And that's about it really. Good stuff as is follows, great story, great retelling of an origin story, good acting, a memorable script, decent effects, using Chicago as a backdrop for Gotham which I am totally cool with even though it's quite obvious Gotham is a gothic caricature of New York City, and for the first installment of a trilogy it does it's job well. Also, side note the reason I fraking LOVE Batman movies is because somehow, I don't know how, the movies keep getting better as time goes on. But not....film wise, kinda. I'll try to explain. You see when you delve into this mythos, these stories, these characters, you notice little details. Call them easter eggs, call them references, whatever but once you know something you can connect it to something else, especially in comic book media. It's like, every adaptation, every retelling, every version of this story compliments everything so much. People hated that Jim Gordon drives the Batmobile in this movie, but recently Jim Gordon actually becomes the Batman in the comics! The whole scheme of destroying Gotham is strikingly, even suspiciously too similar to Arkham Knight with Scarecrow and his plans. It's that sort of references that always make it well worth my time to revisit and watch not just these movies, but all things Batman. I live it, I breathe it.....because I'm Batman!!!

Going In Style

Well I'd say that was worth the wait.

Going In Style is a very good movie, it's a comedy, a heist, and a buddy movie all at the same time. The plot revolves around 3 friends who after working for a steel company for 40 years learns that it's shutting down, and their pensions are being taken away. And that's actually really hard to watch because these things do happen, in this day and age quite often. So they decide screw it, they don't have much to lose, so they decide to rob a bank to provide for them until the end of their days. Casting is great, I mean you got Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman, and Alan Arkin, star studded cast if there was one. Comedy is very good, Christopher Lloyd has a small role and I could not stop laughing when he was on screen, I just wasn't expecting to see him so I got a real kick out of that. All in all, it's a funny movie, you want to see these guys succeed and get to live their life in comfort, and I don't think the ending will disappoint you. Well that's it for today. Next week, I don't know. I'll figure something out. It is my birthday soon.....

Last Vegas

God this week sucked! School has been kicking my ass all week, so screw it. Let's go to Vegas.

Last Vegas is a truly hilarious movie, with a lot of heart and an all star cast. So let's round up those movie totals, we have: Michael Douglas, Robert DeNiro, Morgan Freeman, Kevin Kline, Mary Steenburg, one vegas trip, one bikini contest, several scantily clad cleveage showing beautiful ladies, pelvis gyrating, over 100 bottles of alcohol, one viagra pill, one bachelor party, 4 stars check it out! So our story begins with Michael Douglas getting married to a 31 year old woman, and his friends decide to take him out to Vegas for a bachelor party. This movie seems like the elderly version of The Hangover, but really it has a lot more heart and not nearly as outrageous or insane. You do get a great sense of the bond they have, and they do fight and bicker but really, what group of friends don't? So the story isn't exactly brilliant, it's a popcorn comedy movie and it knows it. It still takes time to develop it's characters, and the jokes made me laugh to beat the band. You know what I don't get? Why there are so many of these types of movies? Old man or old guys do stuff old folks usually wouldn't do, usually leading to a laugh out loud adventure, and ends with them returning to normal life albeit with a very memorable moment of their life now with them. I mean I like those movies, I'm friggin' reviewing Going In Style tomorrow! So obviously they hit a stride with me. This a good movie, not great but hey with a movie called Last Vegas I'm not expecting an Academy Award winning film. But that would be awesome.

Lucy

Grinning like the Joker folks. Grinning like a madman.

Yes...oh yes! Hello beautiful, amaze me like you always do. This movie is quite possibly the most fascinating and amazing example of film ever produced. It is the most difficult film to explain, becauses it gets so intuitive it actually almost seems to pass eternity, round back and become something new again and again. But to put it in basic terms, Lucy is a victim of circumstance being roped into a drop off with a crime boss which causes her to have drug pouches placed into her abdomen. Whilst enduring some physical trauma the drug leaks into her system and that's where things start getting very interesting. The film is only an hour and a half long but at just about the 30 minute mark, the real game begins. Lucy slowly over the course of 24 hours is able to use 100% of her brain capacity and that results in her being able to do everything, and I do mean everything! You know what happens? She becomes Q from Star Trek: The Next Generation, an omnipotent being able to manipulate anything and everything. And the film is very visual in it's storytellimg and has a sheer genius script that gives an honest, believable explanation as to why we do not use our full 100% capacity of our brain, because it makes us more machine than human. Emotions are slowly dying whilst intelligence continues to grow. There is no way in hell that I can ever do this movie justice by just talking about it. This is a necessary, fundamental film to see. I cannot dream of how far this film delves into pretty much the basic essence of everything. When I say watch this movie, I mean really watch this movie. Prepare to be enlightened.

The Lego Movie

Yeah not quite what you were expecting for the first review of the year. But a great movie nevertheless.

The story is actually not that original at first but grows and grows the deeper you delve into it. It follows an everyday average guy who gets swept up in a grand adventure through a case of mistaken identity. Sound familiar? It should but because of the characters themselves and the unique setting you really don't mind that the plot is like that because it takes you for turns and different scenarios that make the film great. Everything and I do mean everything is made out of Legos! Not just the characters, but the ground, the sky, the water, everything! And the animation style itself is kind of blocky (ba dum tss) like it's not exactly Harryhausen style of stopmotion to where it is so fluid and looks completely real it is more like how little Lego videos are made online. They can't move that fluidly because they are made of blocks so it seems stilted and that is by no means a bad thing. In fact, people loved it so much so that they screamed betrayal when the Academy Awards did not feature The Lego Movie for Best Special Effects and Best Animated Movie. The humor is great and some of it does rely on how the whole world is made of Legos so they can build different and crazy stuff but not entirely. The acting is great and we got a hell of a cast in this movie. We got Chris Pratt as our hero, Elizabeth Banks as our heroine, Will Ferrell as our villain, Liam Neeson as a corrupt cop, and even God himself Morgan Freeman as the mentor to our heroes. So quite a bit of star power behind this fun little movie. Bottom line, it's a great movie and I never get tired of watching it. If you want a visually different movie or just like Legos I highly recommend you seek this movie out. You'll like it and your kids will love it.