Wednesday, April 28, 2021

Mortal Kombat Annihilation

What a heavy load Einstein must have had. F***ing morons everywhere!

I'm in a bad mood, like what an absolute waste of 90 minutes and 3 dollars, both of which I will never get back. I don't need to tell you this movie is a dumpster fire, anyone with a brainstem can witness that and testify to it. That was the one thing I did not like in the first Mortal Kombat was they sequel baited it at the end, and one of the only few good things I can say about this movie is that it picks up right where the last movie ended. Now I pose this question because my knowledge of Mortal Kombat is basic, harboring on adept, is Shao Khan the emperor of Outworld? Cause that's who Raiden said turned up, and I'm not sure. But anyway so he pops up bringing with him a cabal of nearly every villain up until Mortal Kombat 3, leading Liu, Katana, Sonya, and a healthy dose of new characters to stop him. I will now disclose the 3 things I liked about this movie, we actually get a Scorpion vs. Sub-Zero fight which was missing in the last which was kind of a bummer but I didn't mind much, and the fight goes for a decent length here and easily is the best fight in the entire movie. The soundtrack isn't bad with good tracks, with of course Techno Syndrome still the main theme. And Sandra Hess as Sonya Blade, I'm not joking she actually did really really good in this movie, and I have zero issue with Bridgette in the first film but her performance was 99% pouty and pissed off, but Sandra is the best actor in the film for my money, giving a lot of humor and warmth for lack of a better word, she's awesome. Everything else, what. Like man when even my technologically inept ass could probably make a better fan made Mortal Kombat movie in terms of special effects and costumes, I really have no words. I have seen bad CG, many a time in fact, this might be the worst. I mean wow. Everything is so slap dash in this f***ing movie, literally every aspect, I'm almost positive there was a blood sacrifice to Azazel for this movie to even hit theaters. Yes, this was theatrically released. Not direct to VHS which is how I saw it when I rented it from Blockbuster when I was probably 12, and I don't remember liking it even back then. I like the scene with Jade, though I'm positive that was for more specific fact every guy in this movie hits on Jade. You need to get laid filmmakers. I just...I'm so done with this movie. I was done with it 5 minutes in, if you honestly sit through this longer than 5 or 6 minutes and you don't have to review it like me, superhuman endurance man, like proper incredible feats of patience and acceptance. Death is only a temporary moment of displeasure for true peace. Just watch Cinemassacre's Rental Review, I'm done, I'm away. What did I give the animated movie? Like a 2 or 3/10? Shit. 0.5 star, 1/10, never again. Let's hope the new animated movie is good so we can get off the bumpy road of quality.

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