Monday, March 8, 2021


Okay I could have sworn I did this movie at some point.

I would have bet money I already reviewed the film debut of Susan Anton as Olympic trainee Goldine (and no her trainer is not named Misty) for the 1980 Olympics, as a reporter Jack Dryden tries to figure out what makes her the absolute cream of the sports crop. Seamless transition over with, let's talk about the movie. Now I will fully admit this movie came to my attention because of the Cinema Snob in one of his best reviews I'd say, so the movie was on my radar quite a bit before I took on this near 6 year odyssey. I even bought the film, which you can only get on VHS or Laserdisk, the first or second year I was in college when I was already reviewing movies so you can see why I thought I did it already. And just like the Snob I friggin' love Goldengirl. Susan Anton though never acting once in her life in a movie before is surprisingly grand, yeah it can be heavily dramaticized to the point of soap opera moments, but I'll be damned if I said that she and every other actor in this movie was not giving it their all. And for a film about a supposed natzi testing a growth serum on his adopted daughter to win acclaim after she wins the gold at the Olympics, that is saying a lot. You think I would trash the pure absurd quality of this script but the way the film progresses, and the acting quality seen within make it work. Plus any film with James Coburn is a-okay with me man, though the age gap is a bit much I genuinely do like the relationship between Jack and Goldine. The production quality is really nothing to write home about, it's standard and got theatrical as well as TV premieres, but points must go to the musical aspect with composer Bill Conti at work and even Susan can sing not half badly. The appeal of the film is incredibly niche, you have to be in a certain mood to watch it and you might not think much of it afterwards. But for me, I dig it, I totally can roll with this movie, appreciate it, and thoroughly enjoy it. Which is odd considering the fact that well, the film isn't exactly accurate in retrospect. The film was released in 1979 with the idea that Goldine is training for the 1980 Olympics. In Russia. In the Cold War. In the only point in history the U.S. has boycotted the Olympics. Whoops. Will give this movie credit for having major balls, I remind you this was a movie shown on TV and we have, alluded to nazi experiments, lots of strong language with the exception of the F and C words, and uncensored nudity! You see bewbs for quite awhile in one scene! How...the shit did this roll? A theater, fine that's one thing, but I'm shocked they got away with that much for television. They have a better chance showing it now on cable and not having to censor a thing. And that's sort of the kick in the ass about this movie, it's availability is scarce. I might as well have reviewed some obscure foreign film from the early 1930s, like you either find it on some website and good luck on that front or you buy the VHS like my nerdy ass and dust off the old CRT television for the complete immersive experience. Or you can just watch Brad's review and get a lot of laughs like I do, and even that review is easier to find than the movie itself. So why did I review it? Well it's gonna be a rough week in terms of reviews so I wanted to grab anything I could and I really wanted to give this movie some attention and love. I personally give it 4 stars, 7.5/10, it might not have won the gold but it stole my heart, and I would be a fool to not meet Susan Anton at some point. 

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