Batman The Doom That Came To Gotham

I'm not entirely sure where I stand with this.

When I saw the trailer I thought, oh shit yeah Gotham By Gaslight meets H.P. Lovecraft's Cthulu mythos, sign me the hell up! I mean what a fascinating idea, to do a late 19th/early 20th century story where Batman has to stop some whacked out cult from essentially doing what Rasputin was trying to do in Hellboy and summon some Outer God leviathan to our realm, that's a solid ass plot that I think is awesome! That really is not entirely the movie I got, and I truthfully 100% can absolutely see this from both sides. There's Batman iconography present, you do get some of the characters but they pretty much take the lore, throw it up in the air, watch it fall into a shredder, and take a flamethrower to it just for good measure. I kind of expected this to follow the Gotham By Gaslight adaptation with Bruce Greenwood returning, but it's an entirely other adaptation of a comic I had no clue existed until the credits rolled, and it's just so fundamentally different to an almost extreme level. On one hand I kinda appreciate that, they don't do some partially by the numbers Batman movie and do so much original and innovative things with the concept of these characters but at the exact same time it's such a radical change that it's almost alienating even to a hardcore fan like me. I know they wanted to tell a grand epic story mixing and melding these two very different worlds together but I think the direction was in the wrong place while their hearts were in the right place. And the same goes for the Cthulu mythos themselves, it takes pre-established facts about these enormously unnatural beings and kinda just wanted to use the imagery but not the essence of those literary sources. Bruce stares down an outer god not once but twice and retains his sanity almost fully, and I'm like.....???? Beg pardon? Cause that's kinda what they do, that's part of the horror of it all to see such overwhelmingly just unearthly creatures to where your mind can't process it and you go insane instantly. When fucking Bird Box does a better job with this shit, I don't think you get it. I really do think this is a film that appeased neither fandom and falls through the cracks. And yet there are aspects I quite like! I think the animation is very solid, I like the idea that Talia and Ra's are the head of the cult trying to summon Yog-Sothoth pretty much, I like how Etrigan comes into play he fits perfectly with this kind of story, seeing the steampunk detailing for the gadgets are fucking sick honestly, even just as simple of a concept as Batman having to utilize science to fight magic is fascinating. There are little gold nuggets here and there, and you could tell they were onto something good but it came apart at the seams. That sucks man. Especially when the story really didn't seem that hard to fuck up. Craft a story where Bruce returns to Gotham and becomes the Batman, have him wander across a truly disturbingly brutal ritualistic killing case, do some detective work into the Cthulu mythos that leads him perhaps to Ra's perhaps to some Otherworld's variant of the Court Of Owls, he learns their plan, you pepper in some fights against henchmen and maybe individuals who enhance themselves with dark magic throughout the movie, maybe he employs the help of Jason Blood at one point to equip Batman with some magical protective gear, they go stop the ritual midway as this multi-eyed tentacled creature is coming through a portal, bada-boom! Perfect! End of movie. Brevity is the soul of wit, you keep it nice and simple and it most likely will turn out good! So I can't fullheartedly recommend it to fans novice or experienced in either camp, but it certainly isn't horrible either. I give it 2 stars, 5.5/10. We got some more horror stuff so fingers crossed and I will see you next time.

Death (2019)

Criminally short but great.




I was thoroughly shocked I wasn't aware of this little short, I am hardcore for The Sandman and even more hardcore for his older sister, and it surprised me even more to learn this only came out 3 years ago but then again life got thrown into a whirlpool quite quick so I'll cut me some slack. I was expecting before doing any real brief research a 30 something minute adaptation of one of Neil Gaiman's stories, but what I got was a 17 minute original story of an artist who is severely having a rough time before meeting a quite sweet girl who obliges to pose for him, before big bombshell here folks, friggin' cutie pie yumness over there, she's Death. I am trying really reallyyyy hard here not to just devolve into just obscene gushing over this woman, I am physically attempting to contain my immeasurable joy in seeing her and my neverending crush on this lovely lady. She has my heart in this world and the next, it is her above anyone else, and I am a shamelessly wholesome Dude stating facts. I gotta go now. Color me impressed with how much good stuff they put in this absurdly short film, you get a real solid grasp on our painter Vincent, his life, his passion for art, and how he manifests his inner demons. I really can see so many people just getting it, you know? They know what it's like, they have been there before, it's very easily relatable. The animation is very good as well, with how lighting and atmosphere changes so quick, the abandoned streets of Gotham (Represent!), the character designs I see bits of anime influence but this is very much the standard quality of DC animated projects, it sorta reminded me of a mix between Batman Year One and Throne Of Atlantis. And I gotta admit I've never been able to quantify the voice I hear in my head when I read The Sandman books and come across Death, but Jamie Chung pretty rock solid choice I very much liked her vocal performance here. Leonardo Nam gets that emotional drama through in a short period and while I saw that ending coming a substantial mile away it didn't detract at all from his last minutes of acting. Talking of which, wow that was so cool! Amazing how far we've come with animation. And can you believe, you can watch the whole thing on the YouTubes, no charge! Worth the time in my opinion. I give it 4 stars, 9/10! The only reason it isn't 10/10 is because it's just too damn short. Yet what a strangely accurate portrayal of life, short yet filled with so much, joy and sadness, the facing of death around you before your own time comes, the pursuit of things you love. Here one minute. Gone the next. But you get what everyone gets, you get a lifetime.

Planet Hulk

It's good to be back.

Yes right before Black Widow makes a return to the big screen I decided to review the 2010 animated feature Planet Hulk. Pretty much if you've ever wanted to see a Conan The Barbarian movie with the Hulk, look no further. I'm not entirely sure if this movie is in continuity with other animated Marvel movies at that time because the film opens with the Avengers exiling the Hulk before he albeit very contrivedly lands on a planet ruled by an evil king, where he must do battle in the arena to gain his freedom while some prophecy nonsense is spouted about him being the highlander, the Kwisatz Haderach, Neo, whatever. For a movie clocking in at 80 minutes, it doesn't feel like it. The plot is always moving at a quick pace but not to the point of confusion, and you sure get your money's worth of fight scenes easily. The animation aspect is decent, it's not highly detailed but neither is it saturday morning cartoon quality, it falls somewhere inbetween. The supporting cast of characters is also decent, each a species of the native planet, we got Korg who really just reminds me of the rock guy from Thor Ragnarok, Elloe a freedom fighter who I'm honestly surprised is not royalty, Miek who looks like a charcoal gray Zorak, and Hiroim a sort of warrior priest. So you get that sword and sorcery type story despite it being on an alien planet, with unexpected amounts of gore and a easily predictable plot. It's decent but you have to be a hardcore fan of either Marvel or the Hulk to track it down, but I got to see my favorite character smash shit and get a badass girlfriend. I genuinely can't complain too much. I was actually happy this was a speaking Hulk story instead of going for the mute brute, but I'm not sure how to feel about the red eyes he has or the odd blood thing. That's new to me. You can tell a good chunk of this movie was lifted for Thor Ragnarok while still entirely being it's own thing which I dig. It was enjoyable, basic, yet kinda fun. 3 stars, 7/10, I'm coming home for you honey on Friday!

Batman And Harley Quinn

Before I start this review I would just like to say, what the f*** was that??

Okay I'm gonna level with you, I really really, let me say that one more time, REALLY did not think this was going to be good. I saw the trailer for this and it looked like hot garbage, and I was half correct. At some points I was very much enjoying this little animated feature but other times I just rolled my eyes and wanted it to end prematurely. I know my history with the DC animated movies is peppered at best, but I just really haven't strongly agreed with the way they do things. Now am I saying they can't make something incredibly interesting and entertaining? Of course not. But this is the prime example of what I would call a hot mess. But what's the story for this oddball cartoon? Well Poison Ivy and the Floronic Man are creating a special serum to transform all fleshy creatures into plant hybrids, with Batman and Nightwing getting the help of Harley Quinn for some weird ass reason to stop them. Now the idea of a Batman/Harley Quinn story could be incredibly interesting if used properly, and indeed the character interactions for the most part are handled very well and even the humor hit more than missed, but...whew, when they strike out they strike out. So let's talk about the good stuff first. The cast is actually really damn good, of course we have Kevin Conroy as Batman and gives his stamp of quality, I did give Melissa Rauch some good grief over her voice the first time I heard it but she won me over quick as Harley and din't bother me at all, Paget Brewster I think is one of the best voices of Ivy in the past decade, and Loren Lester is a bit of fun as Nightwing. The animation style is a dream, bringing back The New Batman Adventures sleek and modernized character designs with classic additions from The Animated Series throughout, it was a joy to see that gorgeous car again some 15 years later. And I won't dare even spoil how Harley turns Ivy off this evil plan, but it is so goddang funny I could barely breathe. Again, the character interactions are done well and do still feel like your watching an extension of The Animated Series, and the humor struck more than missed for me. However! On the flip side some of the character interactions wanted me to bleach my eyeballs and bash my head in with a meat tenderizer. And when the humor fails it's almost uncomfortably bad, but I find it only fails when they force a stupid joke instead of it just being humorous dialogue between characters with a history. It's ridiculously short, barely clocking in past one hour so it keeps the momentum and pace incredibly quick and never once does it get dull. It's just such a mixed bag, and a hot mess to boot. I just really hate how they try to shove so much adult stuff in there, like I swear to the celestial beings if I took a shot every time I saw Harley Quinn's ass I'd be pretty hammered. The language isn't that big a problem for me but sometimes it does feel like a lot. I thought the point of animation was to market your product to every age group possible not just "adult" angsty teens who love to hear cuss words. Which is why I'm really super hesitant to watch that animated Harley Quinn series, it's embarassing. We don't watch animated films for sexual situations and adult language, we watch them to see good animation, and really good characters. Now we did get that in this movie but it is bogged down just a teeny tiny little bit with the other stuff. Did I still nerd out over the throwback aesthetic and easter egss, oh hell yeah. Would I probably watch it again, hell no but I walked away with a mostly positive experience anyway. Personally, I would say just watch a few clips of it on YouTube and call it a day. 3 stars, 6.5/10, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but I still had issues and unfortunately I'm out of tissues. I am also severely dissapointed in you if you thought that was a dirty joke.

Next time, a short lived series that may have something to it.

Suicide Squad Hell To Pay

Well that was interesting.

The new animated Suicide Squad movie, DC's 4th unnecessary R-rated movie. Yeah, yeah, I pick on their R movies but mostly it's useless and not much has changed this time around. But regardless, it's a decent movie and while granted Assault On Arkham was better in my eyes (despite the rampant fanservice), I still enjoyed and had fun with Hell To Pay. This time around, the Squad is delving into the more occult corners of the DC universe chasing after a literal get out of hell free card for Amanda Waller, while battling off Randall Savage, and Reverse Flash, while meeting more obscure characters in the DC library like Dr. Fate and Knockout. And really how bad can a movie be where the Suicide Squad goes on a mission in a Winnebago van? I feel the trailer was a bit misleading though, it set up this Quentin Tarantino Grindhouse look and feel and the movie didn't deliver. True it delivered ridiculous amounts of blood and violence, but beyond that the R rating did not need to be put here. Beyond one brief glance of a naked lady it could have been PG-13 like the last one! Sorry, sorry, I rant about this but you know I am right! Urgh, moving on. Cast is good like always, though Tara didn't sound that healthy this time around but I hope she's okay, all the characters were done correctly and we got some new team members which I appreciate, there was no nonsense or added side stories, though some story elements were kinda dropped but they did a good job. The animation still holds their normal quality, it was cool seeing the Squad go beyond Gotham or Central City and surprisingly no Bat in sight this time round but this movie doesn't need Bruce, it delved into more obscure and lesser known characters which of course I must commend, the story was interesting and engaging from beginning to end, all the cast was good as always, it ties in with another movie I reviewed from the DC animated library, so I give it....3 stars, check it out. We got some more new movies that just hit video so stick around for those and it's always good to meet up with the Squad again.