X-Men 3 The Last Stand

Do I like it better than X-Men 2? I don't know man!

You know, a lot of people give shit to this movie probably more so of, ooh you didn't adapt the comics right, more than actual shoddy production or acting. I never got it and I still don't. I can see the perspective of some people when they say nothing happened in the second movie, plot wise it was very weak, and while I see it more as a character driven movie than a plot driven movie I can't call it weak myself. But here? So much happens. The government has manufactured a cure for mutants which raises some big questions, Magneto is forming an army, Jean comes back after her Wrath Of Khan death, shit happens in this movie. People die, lines are drawn in the sand, they do the Phoenix story which I hear so much about, it does kinda feel like a true end to the X-Men series. The actors sure treat it like that with Hugh, Patrick, Ian, and even Halle giving it their all for one last bout. I gotta give Halle major credit for this movie, she came off a terrible bomb of a movie and has a very passionate, strong, and take no prisoners attitude with Storm and I for one love it. She really does improve through each movie. It's a shame Alan Cumming didn't return but in his stead we have Kelsey Grammer as Beast. Holy. F***. I am going to be publicly executed by both Marvel and DC fans alike when I say, Kelsey Grammer was better casted as Beast than Hugh Jackman as Wolverine. Yes. I said that. This is coming from a man who for all intents and purposes has fallen in love with Hugh Jackman, that massive dork. If you ask me who my favorite X-Man is, it's Beast. You wanna talk cream of the crop? Good lord, that's some good stuff right there, yeah buddy. So story and cast get check marks from me, maybe if I was hardcore into the comics I'd go ballistic over the Phoenix thing but I can roll with it, she has a split personality and literally dusts people a decade well before Thanos. Huh, there's a standoff for you, Jean Grey full destructive Phoenix mode versus Thanos with the Infinity Gauntlet. I have no clue who would win that. Any well read and informed fans out there, let me know. Effects have improved once more, they throw the cars, do the wirework, blow stuff up so props once more to the effects department. But the CG looks mostly good, with stand out moments being of course the bridge scene and seeing the metal bones under Logan's skin. Pretty good work I must say and some credit must he given for trying out new technology to de-age Patrick and Ian. Do I feel that was necessary? Nope! It was a decent trilogy, set the bar for future Marvel movies especially for Marvel team movies at that, it genuinely was cool to go back and watch them again to solidify my opinion. For this one, I'd give it 3 stars, 6.5/10, in terms of pure entertainment the second one did it all for me. And we got one more week before the rematch of the century, and I'm backing my corner full force next week.

X-Men 2

I'm not calling it X2, it's never happening.

Hot damn this was really good! I expected the quality to go up just a smidge but son of a gun, this was a really good comic book movie. Every single aspect of production, story, character, and effects have been improved significantly. Great camera work, even better performances, the story worked very well for me, I genuinely think this will be my favorite of the trilogy. So the film picks up not long after the first movie with Logan searching for answers of his past, while a military scientist named Stryker hits the X-Men hard and forces them to retaliate. Good solid story, has easily one of the best openings to any comic book movie like ever, even I'm shocked to say this but when I stack it up to opening scenes for other superhero movies it's pretty grand! It kept my interest from start to finish, never got dull, never made me ask volley after volley of questions, they did it good and they did it right. All the cast does mighty good work in this, and you might be saying well of course they do, the main cast gets to spread their wings and build upon their performances but shit man, even Alan Cumming and Brian Cox are so good in this movie. The script is leaps and bounds better than the first in terms of character interactions and plot. The action while more sparse than the first, got a rise out of me from time to time, it looks really cool whether it be Magneto busting out of prison or the standoff between Logan and Deathstrike which was a great fight and appropriate that the stakes are raised. I have got to shout out to Alan Cumming and Rebecca Romijn, oh my God. Are these actors amazing or what? Alan is effortlessly perfect as Nightcrawler, and I may or may not ship him with Storm. But Rebecca man. I almost want to say she gives the best performance in both these movies. Did she even speak a line in the first movie? She barely speaks in this but I cannot believe how great she is as this character through sheer body animation, expressive eyes, and some good attitude in her tiny bit of dialogue. It's hard to think of anyone else as Mystique besides her and God bless her for putting up with that much makeup and prosthetics. Hugh has gotten more comfortable in the role, Ian is somehow more awesome than before, Famke gets some good stuff to work with, and Brian makes a good villain. Effects were handled just as well, good balance of practical effects and improved CG, the fights may be less than expected but it really didn't bother me at all. They played their cards right, and what an improvement over a 3 year period so they had a lot of time to iron out what they wanted to do and make it proper entertaining and very good. Back when movies took time with sequels, Jesus H. Christ I feel bitter about that to be honest. But jaded perspective aside, I very much liked this movie and it was genuinely truly better than I expected. 3 stars, 7/10! The funny part is this is the least watched of the X-Men movies I've seen, it was always either the first movie on video or the third on FX back then that I watched. If I was being brutally honest, pretty sure I've seen the third the most....and that includes Logan. I apologize for that. But I'm making up for it I swear, so see you tomorrow for The Last Stand.

X-Men

This has been coming, and I couldn't think of anything else to do.

It has been probably about...12 years since I have watched any of the X-Men movies and I've only seen the first 3, plus Logan. I don't think my opinion has changed much. And I saw this movie on VHS when I was like 7 years old and had no clue what the f*** was occuring. My expansive knowledge of Marvel included the Hulk, from the TV show and the Ang Lee movie, and the Sam Raimi Spiderman movie. That's it. And you better believe I was playing 20 questions every 30 odd minutes. I was so young I had no concept of the opening scene which Jesus Christ, what a grim way to open your film. F*** me. And I think the worst part is I still have zero idea what to make of the movie. Cause it brings up a lot in it's runtime and I still have questions. The plot isn't too busy though, Logan and Rogue are thrown into this academy led by Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise-D, as they learn more about Xavier, his students, and his frenemy Magneto played by the extraordinary man himself Ian McKellen. And my God the love triangle of Hugh, Patrick, and Ian is the goal of life, they have immeasurable adoration and respect for one another because of this movie series so I can never judge it too harshly. For a movie over 20 years old, and excuse me while I cry in a corner after saying that, it's not a horrible comic book movie. At the time this got a lot of praise, finally they made a live action X-Men show, oh my God I loved the 90s cartoon so this was a dream come true, it did pretty good. Does that still stand? No. But again, they were just starting off, comic book movies were in a massive decline and were oh so slowly clawing their way from the abyss, so I have to give it respect for taking a step towards the bright future where we are today. I think it's a decent adaptation of the source material, though I know little of it but I got the comic references, the actors do fine work and are commited, the effects are hit and miss but the practical usage in this movie I feel was done very well. It's not all flashy CG, you'd be surprised how much they actually do. You can tell there's wirework and breakable sets but I'd rather see that than a green screen. Do I think the sequels will improve in some ways? Oh sure. Hell I'll probably enjoy them more, maybe even give a higher score. But the first X-Men movie isn't horrible, it's a decent albeit average comic book movie that helped pave the way for better things to come. 2.5 stars, 6/10. It was weeeird seeing Hugh Jackman be skinny bollocks in the first movie, the guy has always been in good shape but he filled that role so much in the future (full pun intended), and you lord that casting choice forever over your wife Hugh, because you are too grand.

Die Another Day

It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but that ain't saying much.

I was incredibly shocked at how much I was slightly enjoying Die Another Day, some of the dialogue was really good, some bits of action were pretty damn cool, and while the movie is an absolute hot mess it's not my most hated Bond film. The plot is a bit mad but it has elements that were taken and done correctly in the Craig films, with Bond being captured and tortured for well over a year in North Korea before being traded for an army official that Bond is quite strongly feeling like going after though his 00 status has been cut, he soon meets up with a NSA agent named Jinx as they try to stop the powerful businessman Gustav Graves and his solar lazer called Icarus. I honestly don't know where to begin with this movie. It has some real stupid stuff in it, but there are a few elements which aren't half bad. Yes the CG is laughably terrible almost Spy Kids level quality, but the car chase on the ice with two gadget filled cars is pretty amazing if criminally short. Yes the plot and characters are absurd at times, but the actors don't do a bad job and look like they're having a bit of fun. It's such a mixed bag. Brosnan could have went out on a stronger note but he does okay in this last movie. Halle Berry isn't terrible and genuinely looks happy to be in a Bond film and I quite liked her character, she seemed to be so much more the spy than James oddly enough. Toby Stephens is actually really good in this movie but his character just makes you want to...drink. Rick Yune does pretty well as the henchman and has a cool look if nothing else though again it's bizarre. This film gets brutal though man, I mean daaamn people got all up in arms over Licence To Kill but this movie makes that look like the friggin' Care Bears. Licence To Kill had a quick shot of an exploding head and a shooting of a corpse, but this movie has dismemberment, throat stabbing, lazers blasting through people's heads, it's pretty gruesome and dark at times. Why though, I don't know. God I have such conflicted opinions on this, on one hand it's way too out there for a Bond film and severely hurts the series, but on the other hand it has some decent moments and isn't a complete dumpster fire. So the big question right now is, do I like it more than Thunderball? Well Thunderball got a 5/10 from me and to be perfectly honest Die Another Day gave me a bit more entertainment. So I will give what many consider to be the worst Bond film a 5.5/10, 2.5 stars, you can skip it and I won't blame you but at the same time it has a few highlights. I will however say that after hearing Queen Elizabeth II attended the premiere of this movie, even I feel I have to apologize to Her Majesty for this and I didn't do a thing on this movie. I remember when I rented this from Blockbuster back in the day one night, and I got maybe 10-15 minutes into the movie and I fell right asleep, I had to have been 7 maybe even 8 years old and I don't think I really watched it again after that the next morning and I couldn't remember a damn thing that happened in that movie. So this has been my first viewing in 17 years, and I feel I can go a lot longer than that until my next viewing of this movie. Annnnd that's where we will stop, I hate it too but until the week that No Time To Die premieres this is the end for the James Bond reviews and really the Daniel Craig films are a reboot anyway so it works that way as well. It was a real blast to go through all of them and finally talk about a series that I've been watching just as long as Star Wars or any Jim Carrey movie so I hope you've enjoyed it. I shall attempt to get something out before the month is over and I'm giving myself a personal Christmas gift this f***tacular year, and I'm not reviewing a damn thing in December that has anything to do with cheer, joy, or good will toward men. There will only be dark music in my domain.